LogFAQs > #951703411

Therapy. That's essentially what you're seeking out already by coming to us. But you already know PotD isn't the best place to come for this sort of stuff. A real professional is your best bet at getting your mind on track.

If you can't afford therapy my recommendation is to do some shrooms or ketamine or something in a nice naturey area, find a good book on mindfulness and meditation, and stop drinking alcohol.