LogFAQs > #950541234

Yellow posted...

Therapists don't work for everyone. They need to convince you of a more positive outlook, and some people aren't receptive to that at all.

Psychiatrists can at the very least give you some medication that will alter your brain. Those guys can 100% help anyone that wants to change the way their brain works, very forcefully. Therapists can only help people who are receptive to it. Psychiatrists can only help people who want drugs.

Then there are people like me who suffer from both of those things. I don't have money to throw at a professional friend if it's not going to help me, just a waste of money and time.

Plus my memory is split and segmented. I never remember all my problems at once in one hour a week, only at night when I'm staring at my ceiling. I can't just scan my brain for what's bothering me on the spot. I've never been prescribed the same diagnosis twice, I've made a lot of useless visits to these people. I feel bad for making them feel like failures when in reality they're not designed for me.

I came here to pretty much say this. Also suffer from mental health issues. Depression, suicidal thoughts. You name it, I got it. I am pretty fucking screwed in the head. If you wanna go for meds, thats really a 50/50 issue. Yeah it works... but, thats kinda hard to talk about because I was on 5 god damn different medications! One for depression, one used as a booster, one that is Diazepam for anxiety, one for night terrors, and one for helping sleep at night. And let me tel you right now... its not very ideal to be on that many meds even if you are as fucked up as I am because it turned me into feeling like a zombie. And not to mention I felt more of a fake sort of feeling happiness and it was all just artificial just because these meds I took. But... it did make me mellow which was at least a plus. I dont take them anymore though.
Even when I was suicidal.. the hospital didnt even do anything for me because they cant do anything for me that very night I was, making it all a waste of time and the same old stupid game of 20 questions and before you know it you are out the door on your way to no where with a set of papers to resources that you are already going to or who the fuck knows how else to treat you. Its funny...people only tend to care when you are suicidal at that very moment but the next day and the next day? Nothing never changes...

Now, with that overall being said..I still do see a psychologist and talk twice a week. I guess I do this because it helps keep me alive. And I overall didnt end up trying to kill myself like I almost went for two years ago. So, I guess thats a plus. I try to keep my mind in active things or trying to accomplish something very little such as painting my first ever Bob Ross painting. Those bad suicidal thoughts never really go away for me, its almost fucking painful at times.. and im surprised im still alive these days with my crippling depression at this rate. But, I like to think im struggling along in a sort of ok ish sort of way to stay around a while longer.