It wasn't good. Dad hated me, always told me he wished I was dead. That if I were to die, he'd piss on my grave then dance back to his truck. At any sign of frustration, he'd take it out on me by beating me. Told me no one loved me, or ever would.
Mom always stood up for him, because disagreeing would earn her the same treatment. She'd often beat me too, to spare me from having dad do worse.
Just all around tons of mental and physical abuse. Was never allowed to go out because they were ashamed of me. My brother could do no wrong, but I could do no right. He grew up thinking the world owed him, while I was told I needed to repay any $ my parents spent on me, otherwise I simply owe my life to them.
I seriously HATE myself for this, but I did end up being the man my dad said I was. I'm unloveable and useless. I've been trying so hard to be a good person, someone whose worth being with so maybe one day I can get a family of my own. But no, I'm worthless to everyone. I've made costly mistakes that ruined the only good thing I had in my life.
At this point, I feel I'm too old to effectively change anything. I'm tired of trying and failing.
Fuck, man. That explains your self worth issues.
You always seems a decent and reasoned person here, for the record.