I wish there was a way for people that get down on themselves to see how other people see them. I'm not taking about me, I don't know you. But I highly doubt the other people in your life see you as you seem to view yourself. Perhaps look at yourself through their eyes and have the courage to live up to their beliefs. "I'm ok" Nobody is perfect and you never will be. Good enough is good enough, if it's good enough for everyone else it's good enough for you too. Then maybe you can work on being better TL:DR no read it
People in my real life view me much differently for sure, though I generally lack many close friendships. ---