LogFAQs > #907450251

I'm having trouble finding friends at school. People always tell me to try to form study groups and actually talk to people in class. While I haven't done the former, I have done the latter. The problem is, that there's hardly any time to socialize before class starts and after class ends. I'm very awkward in social situations. I often don't know when a conversation is over or not, which is why I have a tendency to make a motion to leave while the other person is starting to talk again after I had assumed that they were done doing so. Just yesterday, I had this conversation with this bloke about a class we had last semester and its final exam. I was about to make a quick conversation and then go to the water fountain to refill my empty bottle of water. And I was so scared about what he would think of me if I left. So I just stood there for many long seconds trying to anticipate if he had anything else to say. He then asked me if I had vector calculus with him, which I confirmed. Then I left to refill my bottle and re-entered the room. Later on, I tried to have this conversation with some other people also in my previous semester's class, and I somewhat succceeded in doing so. I had a back-and-forth with some blokes and it was a fun conversation, but didn't really lead to anything resembling a friendship. Sure, we might get along, but I just can't see how these conversation lasting less than ten minutes can lead to any friendships of any sort, especially when we will get interrupted by the thing that brought us to the classroom to begin with. And even if I did ask to "hang out" with people after class, I am very confident that I am not a good conversationalist. I am the most boring person whom I know, as I've reiterated many, many times on this board. So naturally I'd be too afraid to "hang out" because I'm very afraid that I will have absolutely nothing to say. Additionally, I'm scowling all the time, which makes it more likely for people to be intimidated by me, and to be scared if I approached them, which is why sometimes people give me strange looks that can be interpreted as being afraid of me. As a result, I don't really feel comfortable approaching those people if I feel like they're intimidated by me, which makes me feel even worse about myself. I just don't feel very comfortable at all smiling all the time, that's all. I know that it's very sad when I'm first learning social etiquette when I'm twenty-four-years-old, and should be doing many things, such as living on my own, and paying rent and such. But I'm just not normal, and I can't work enough hours at my job to cover a seven-hundred dollar rent in this state because I must allot time to attend school and do homework. Even if I did work enough hours to cover rent, food, and utilities, I'd be even more alone and moreover without emotional comfort of any sort. I'm also really tired and exhausted nowadays, partly because I'm so miserable and friend-less all the time. It's a really sad life, and lately, I'm getting tired of living it. I don't mean that I wish to off myself; I just mean that life gets mundane, tiring, and it's very hard for me to feel any genuine happiness. I am aware of the possibility of befriending some bloke will not rid me of all my unhappiness, but I really do want to make friends. So how would you suggest finding friends in college, TC?
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Number XII: Larxene.
The Organization's Savage Nymph.