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#146 - The Final Solution Nominated by: Anagram

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Before he stumbled around like a drunken ent in Batman & Robin, Jeep Swenson was a "PoH" or "Pal of Hogan." Part of an elite group of so-called stars that could claim membership in the geriatric version of the Kliq, Jeep existed to make Roman look strong. Sorry, that meant to read "make Hogan look strong." Freudian typo. Swenson lacked any true claim to fame aside from his stature and a few appearances in films and stuntwork, but that was enough for Hogan - Swenson was bulky, brutish and could take orders.

So it was that in March of 1996, we were gifted the most utterly heinous match in WCW history, without question - the Doomsday Cage match. You see, Hulk Hogan had been traipsing across the WCW landscape over the previous few months. In his mind, he had been a real team player. He'd actually allowed three people to beat him (all with significant interference to prevent anyone from looking strong), and he felt it only right that they return the favor to the massive self-absorbed wannabe messiah of pro wrestling that was Hogan's ego. So why not rip the Band-Aid off? Why not make everyone job to him in one match?

So, in an 8-on-2 match, Hogan and Randy Savage took on the Dungeon of Doom, the Four Horsemen and two part-time Z-List actors in a triple decker cage. I don't even want to explain this atrocity. Just watch it:

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Be aware that they used the best workers on the top of the cage, and were forced to send them back in at the end because the guys on the bottom were completely blown up from STANDING THERE DOING NOTHING. That's how much of a non-wrestler Jeep Swenson was.

On a side note, Brian Pillman was supposed to be in this match, but he was replaced by Barbarian. Pillman, who was red-hot at the time, had caught the eye of Hogan. The Hulkster's narcissism naturally knew no bounds. Who was this young up-and-comer that somehow was getting heat? Perhaps I could siphon off this heat like a booking vampire, thought Hogan. Perhaps I could job him in one of the myriad of cages at Uncensored! Pillman grew wise to this and was able to convince WCW management that he was recovering from a routine throat surgery (he had suffered from polyps since childhood), and escaped the match.

He then left WCW in the most amazing case of a company getting worked by kayfabe ever, but we'll save that story for a later write-up.
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