I'm really sorry to hear this sable, I'm hopeful that you're able to get some form of closure out of this when it is all said and done. If it helps, I have a funny tradgedy that (hopefully) might help a little.
My grandmother was the sweetest woman in the world to me. She was a tiny little firecracker of a woman who barely spoke English, yet could communicate by just wildly gesturing.
She had breast cancer, she had a mastectomy and underwent treatments. One day, she goes to the same hospital for a routine checkup and was found to be completely cured! To celebrate, her and her best friend went out for dinner. As they were walking back, she was hit by a car and killed deader than a banker's heart. It was all over in an instant.
She died on the same day she finally beat cancer.
Here's the second kicker; she died on exactly the same day her eldest brother did, 60 years later to the day & almost the same time of day.
Life...life really has a way of fucking with us sometimes. As an undertaker, I see the stories of people who wished they could have said they loved someone just one more time. Ultimately, we get the chances we get. I bet my bottom dollar your mom knew you loved her, I like to think I know you well enough to know that.
How is that a funny story, wtf ---
The above post is literally and objectively right.