LogFAQs > #969041328

https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/y0ss7o/the_patriarchy_hurts_men_but_they_blame_it_on/

The patriarchy hurts men, but they blame it on women. This toxic masculinity hurts women, kills women. We all know that, but it also hurts men and boys.

As the mother of a boy, I raised him to be aware of his feelings and did my best to teach him healthy ways of dealing with and expressing them. Society and his father negated my teachings. Now he's unhappy and turning into an Incel at 25. He blames me.

Until we have a major societal change, nothing your mother teaches you will stick. I'm sure, had my son been a daughter, everything I taught her would have also been negated. She'd have had the same chance of internalizing our sick society and blaming it on me, just as my son did.

How do we fix this shit? I seriously thought teaching my son how to be a balanced human was the answer, but when the societal norms negate those teachings, it seems to make no difference.

People don't get that a risk to raising a boy with "socially conscious" values is the possibility of stunting the growth of his ability to confidently approach women and not second guess himself.