Eddie Guerrero vs. Perry Saturn
Chyna knocks down Saturn so she can chase after Terri. Saturn hits back Chyna so Terri can flee.
Oh here's the "European Championship" graphic a full minute into the match. Whoops.
Guerrero's already hitting hurricanranas from the top rope.
Saturn gets out of the ring and Chyna runs him into the stairs. Guerrero with a splash from the top. He likes the ladies. Now he jumps in the ring with another hurricanrana. Power bomb from Saturn gets both guys down.
Guerrero's fighting back, tornado DDT. Saturn's bleeding from the top of his head. Now he's trying some power moves, another hurricanrana from Guerrero.
Suplex reversed into a rollup, nice move, now Guerrero's caught and power bombed again. Saturn tries a moonsault and misses. Guerrero hits the brainbuster.
Guerrero misses a senton bomb and what on earth is he trying. He almost gets pinned. Saturn goes up top and gets dropkicked off. Now he's attacking Chyna and Terri runs back out. She kicks Guerrero between the legs.
Flying elbow drop from Saturn and he somehow wins. This guy seems like the most boring of the Radicalz so far, his large muscle mass is mostly what he's got going.
Oh wait Christian was faking all along. Oh no they have to fight the Acolytes later.
Angle steals Undertakers motorcycle. Or he would but he can't drive it.
Dallas Stars can't win multiple championships, they're awful. Oh, no time for a pose, here's APA. Bradshaw tells off these guys and their cheap heat, he's a Texan and proud. Time to namedrop the Freebirds and Von Erichs.
Edge & Christian vs. Acolytes
Faarooq grabs some stairs and is beating away right away. Luckily he's not DQed.
Christian tries a springboard crossbody and he's caught. Fallaway slam from the 2nd rope.
Here comes a powerbomb and Edge keeps flopping before he can go up. Third try and Bradshaw hits it. Christian cheats when the ref is distracted.
"USA! USA!" chants. Take that, Canada.
Bradshaw is stuck in the wrong corner as the champs keep tagging. He pushes both guys off and gets Faarooq in. Spinebuster, here's Bradshaw with a clothesline and Christian sells it so hard.
Faarooq hits Christian with the dominator and Edge uses the tag belt as a weapon to get DQed. All four guys fight as they leave.
Big Bossman is checking IDs at a bar.
Angle attacks Undertaker with a wrench.
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ONLY FIVE CAN LADDER.
Sushi, kamikaze, fujiyama, nippon-ichi...