Last Post: 5:49:55pm, 04/28/2024
Still Playing: Spellcorked! (Finale)
More Thoughts:
-Potion order: Strong strength and medium courage, strong strength and medium love. Ok. Um. I think strength is new?
-I got more spam. This one is telling me about harpies in my shoes. Im less interested in this than the hot single witches in my area, I got to be honest.
-The two cat things start talking about ordering drugs. This is another game where the funny segments are really starting to wear thin quickly.
-UGH THE STUPID NEW INGREDIENT IS ANOTHER RANDOM RUNE THING. Im never going to get strong strength from this.
-It is a bearpaw cactus, or something like that. I hate you, stupid cactus.
-Well I cant get strong strength either time and not just because thats a dumb pairing of words.
-These random ones are no fun.
-Honest spoilers none of them are really fun at the moment. This is wearing thin fassssst.
-Uh oh I didnt play for like three days and now I cant remember what any of the stupid potions do. -Luckily I got some detailed notes up above so I guess Ill dig through that.
-Three requests for today: Medium Strength, Weak Joy and Weak Caution, and Weak Armor.
-New ingredient is dragon scales and they are processed just the way as the coffee beans and the dewdrop berries. Wow they really only did have three ideas here, huh?
-Yeah I guessed which end of the spectrum was wisdom and which was armor so I get one of the orders wrong. Cool
-Whatever. Next days orders: Strong armor and strong water, medium joy and weak spirit, medium fluff and weak water.
-And the next ingredient cloud lavender is one of those pick the runes at random and hope you do it right the first time because its all arbitrary ones. I hate those more than the other things I also hate in this game.
-Man this game is potion making and some boring messages from your girlfriend pig monster who is off on a much more interesting quest. She keeps emailing you about this cool stuff she's seeing and then meanwhile I'm stuck making the fortieth of the same potion. TAKE ME WITH YOU.
-Oh, and then also your hideous cat monsters sometimes try to say something funny. And thats the whole game. I hate it. I HATE IT.
-Next day: Strong joy and weak strength, weak spirit, medium misery.
-No new ingredients today so it is even easier than the other days. Im playing this game in like twenty parts so far just because it is so boring Im having a hard time stringing long play sessions together.
-Strong caution, Weak courage and medium fluff, Weak sleep, Weak magic. Im not even doing full sentences anymore. These are just the orders I need to make.
-Yknow, I have gone two more days without new ingredients. Please add the ones Im missing. I know this game wont end until you do and I CANT TAKE ANY MORE.
-Strong growth, Medium scream, Medium fire and weak spirit
-New item: ghost peppers. Hm I wonder where I can get the fire from
-Oh the high processed peppers give me curse and not fire. Duh whod I not figure that out from the start???
-Oh cool glitches. So it started a bit ago and every time I opened the computer, it would kind of freeze and Id have to back out and go back into the computer to be able to select things. This time, the bottle you pour into disappears entirely. Its just gone. I could make the potion but when I went to wrap it there was just a empty fill in where the bottle should go. THEN after the third order of the day the game just dies entirely, crashes, and forces me to go back in. No wonder they couldnt do more than three mini-games this thing was hanging by a thread this whole time.
-Only two today: strong life and medium life. These potions are giving them LIFE and I am here for it.
-Noooo the phoenix feather ingredient is another one of those random totem mixing ones. I take it back I am not here for it.
-The crazy thing is even with the new items, the actual totems remain the same and once you use them you have a little cartoon of what each one does. Fun idea but the cartoon is always, always the same. So Ive done like four different ones now and have to just sit through the cartoon even though Ive seen in like 156 times by now.
-Well I mess them both up due to randomg guessing. Always a fun time.
-Next day: Weak scream and medium growth, medium vigor, weak sleep and weak water
-Big day the next day: Strong water and strong spirit, Medium spirit, Weak strength and medium misfortune, Strong fortune. Im afraid doing four at once might put me to sleep but here we go.
-While you were making portions, I was studying the blade. This is the funniest line in the game so far, if you want an assessment of how not-amused I am.
-I go through like four more days with no notes because honestly Ive run out of stuff to say and keeping track of what I need to make isnt interesting enough to keep doing it.
-I DO find out that the names of effects are written in the spellbook but it is in the smallest, least legible text ever so I did not see it until literally just now.
-Seriously go up to the pictures above an look at the grimoire for the words if you want to do a sudden vision check.
-I get all the ingredients, and there really are only three varieties of games here. The smush one, the cut one, and the oops I hope you picked the right random totem one.
-It doesnt help that for two of the games, one of the extremes is literally just dont do anything. Like you just skip it sometimes so you dont even do the game part.
-They messed up on truth and amnesia on the final ingredient haha. Like the top part of the spell book says truth and the bottom says amnesia but the requirements are actually flipped. I literally just noticed this thing at the exact time the game fucks it up. Do I have superpowers?
-Well this keeps on going for a while, but after like 85 potions or so I max out my Welp rank and get an email saying something along the lines of the game is over. Cool, I guess.
-That is serious btw, you get an email from the developers that is basically like hey youve seen everything although maybe there are a couple more emails if you keep playing haha maybe who knows. Im good. Im not doing more of this for maybe two more emails with unfunny jokes I dont care about.
-Well, thats it I guess. Definitely disappointing and I kind of hate how lazy the game feels. Like, there are only three minigame styles for the 13 ingredients. You get repeat email types too. Like they reuse the same ten or so customer names and even the email templates repeat really frequently. You couldnt have spent some time to make each one unique?
-Kinda glad to be moving on. This wasnt the worst game on the Playdate but its up there with most boring.
Time Played: Honestly...five to six hours? It feels long but that is in part because of how much of it is the exact same thing. Howlongtobeat dot com has it at six, which is interesting because I think that's the longest game on there for the Playdate so far and also who the hell is updating that site for Playdate games?
High Score: Over 500 eggs means my level is maxed out. First you get the eggs. Then you get the power. Then you get the pig women.
Beaten? Yes.
Grade: This is in the 2-3 range. It shouldn't be that low because it has a really good level of polish to it but it is just whatever the antithesis to fun is.
Favorite Part So Far: The game starts with that sick cat animation and its all downhill from there. Honestly the animations here are super impressive all around. The totem one repeats a millions times, but the little animations for it are really good!
---
Moops?
"I thought you were making up diseases? That's spontaneous dental hydroplosion."