https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KEkhORyu-0Album: The Afterman: Descension
Track: 5
Release Date: 2012
Dark side of me is the 8th track from The Afterman: Descension and was the first signal from this album.
Night begins to fall as Sirius arrives at his house; he awkwardly climbs out of the taxi and slowly makes his way up the path as a rain storm gathers.
Sirius notices someone sitting on the front porch, a police officer who has been waiting for him to arrive. He braces himself to receive even more bad news, and even half expects to be placed under arrest.
As he comes closer, the police is revealed to be Colten, Meris lover. Devastated by the death of Meri and their child, Colten cant bring himself to look Sirius in the eye as he asks single shaky question; Why?
Dozens of responses rush through Siriuss head; The car was going too fast, The spaniding barrier was too weak, The doctors focused too much on me.
Before he can answer, Colten interrupts him; Why did you have to come back? You just couldnt let her go.
The words hit Sirius harder than anything he experienced in the keywork; he turns to face Colten, who meets his gaze for a brief moment before walking off into the gathering rain.
The full tragedy of Siriuss actions are made clear to him; all through their relationship Sirius kept Meri at arms length as he chased down the secrets of the universe that no one else would.
Only in his absence and presumed death was Meri able to find someone who could give her what Sirius couldnt or wouldnt, who on his return managed to destroy everything.
Crushed by the full weight of his guilt Sirius calls out into the night, to Colten, Meri and anyone else who might be listening; Im sorry!
An unknown amount of time passes; Sirius has gathered the funding required to build a new star-ship under the guise of continuing his research into the key work. His real intention however is to find Meri in the keywork and free her from the Labyrinth.
Sirius reactivates the Allmother AI; when it receives the coordinates, the AI questions Sirius as to why he wants to return to the Keywork after it nearly killed him.
Unable to process his reasoning, the Allmother asks Sirius a single question; Is this what love is?
Lyrics:[Verse 1]
In those discouraging days
I always missed the mark
When we were comfort and close
I would neglect to keep
You safe and unexposed
A portrait of time repeats
This moment now replaced
With an empty wish to give
I give, I gave
[Chorus]
I gave my everything
For all the wrong things
In this cold reality I made
This selfish war machine
Oh, this has become hell
How can I share this life with someone else?
I promise you, there is no weight that can bury us
Beneath the ghosts of all my guilt
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
[Verse 2]
Now in your absence, I wade
Through the coursing, lonely, lost
And in this tragic dismay
I never could believe what I became
[Chorus]
I gave my everything
For all the wrong things
In this cold reality I made
This welcomed war machine
Oh, this has become hell
How can I share this life with someone else?
I promise you, there is no weight that can bury us
Beneath the ghosts of all my guilt
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
[Bridge]
I couldn't give you what you needed
It's all my fault
Too coward to believe I lost it all
[Chorus]
I gave my everything
For all the wrong things
In this cold reality I made
This selfish war machine
Oh, this has become hell
How can I share this life with someone else?
I promise you, there is no weight that can bury us
Beneath the ghosts of all my guilt
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
Here, in the dark side of me
[Outro]
[All-Mother]
"You fought to withdraw from a location which has incited severe, quantifiable pain, and nearly terminated the mission; nearly terminated your life
Yet, you desire to set a course back to it
I am not equipped to comprehend human rationale
Sirius, Is this what love is?"
[Sirius]
" ...Yes."
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