Lurker > Arcanine2009

Torrific posted...

Sometimes I just sit and listen and be an empathetic friend while they go on spewing poison about their co-workers, neighbors, family members, and government, etc.

Everyone vents. If they are overly toxic and do nothing but talk shit and have nothing good to say, then it your choice to cut them out of your life.
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Less is more. Everything you want, isn't everything you need.

EternalDivide posted...

So just listen and sit there stone faced then.
They should talk to a wall then if another human being with normal responses in a conversation is too much for them.

Just listen and offer them sympathy, if you don't know what its like to be in their shoes. If they ask for help, give it to them.I don't see why you can't give advice, but not just for the sake of advice, and give it out when its appropriate and depending on the situation. Too many people come with the, "solving problems" mindset vs just listening and cheering them up. Some people DO just want to vent and don't want you to not give them advice at all. You just have to feel it out. If someone is talking about their feelings on a situation, don't go in there saying,"stop having this mindset. You have to be like this." That's literally my fucking brother. No empathy at all. You can't "solve problems" when there are feelings involved. The people who are disagreeing are the ones that have trouble connecting to feeligns
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Less is more. Everything you want, isn't everything you need.

DrizztLink posted...

The fuck is wrong with asking questions?

From Anna's point of view.. I think it just depends.. Like if you're firing away questions and sort of deflecting from listening and being understanding, it can be annoying to some.

_Matchabuu_ posted...

Hm. Not sure how I feel about this but in general people dont want help, they just want a shoulder to cry on. Which is OK too but still

True. And this is especially a huge issue with people (mostly guys) who didn't grow up comfortable expressing their feelings and were taught how to solve problems as a way of giving advice vs trying to be sympathetic at least
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Less is more. Everything you want, isn't everything you need.

If you want to deny a conversation and make someone feel unheard skip to 1:45



deny their feelings
giving philosophical response
asking questions
defense of the other person
pity
amateur psychoanalysis
giving advice

solution..

listen and give an empathetic response

There's two more unofficial ones if you ask me

8. constant interruption
9.changing the subject
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Less is more. Everything you want, isn't everything you need.

I don't know what the critics were smoking.. Aladdin was fantastic. Easily an 8/10 from me
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Less is more. Everything you want, isn't everything you need.