Lurker > Unknown6721

Bananana posted...

it can be very therapeutic to just write down all your thoughts. it helps organize a jumbled mind because it forces you to think out your thoughts one word at a time

not a pos btw, at least not for the reasons posted in the op, i think doing good things when you dont want to do them is actually the part that makes one a good person. only doing them when its convenient for you is nothing special

Maybe Ill give it a try. I never considered it before. If it helps then why not I guess

@LivingLegend
That was a legit question BTW. I guess it could have came off as me being annoyed or something. Maybe I should get one of the benefit is there

LivingLegend posted...

You really need a diary bro Its not even a joke, Im serious.

Why? What would that even accomplish?

--Zero- posted...

I feel like a shitty person, I better log onto my alt so no one judges me!

This is 100% correct lol

El Mexicano Texano posted...

You're a good person you just don't know why you're a good person.

This... makes sense

I feel better about it now that I brought it up. I guess morals guide everyone. I just felt like I was a bad person for not actually wanting to do the acts that I do

My job changed where I work alone most of the day. I like it but it also lets me self reflect. I... think Im a piece of shit person.

If you met me, I would probably come off as a nice person. I do lots of nice things I guess but I dont want to do any of it. I feel that my morals always carries me through all this stuff eventhough I dont want to. Ill Ive you many examples.

My niece is an only child with few friends because of COVID. Her Dad doesnt play with her much it seems. Spending time is more like watching TV together or something. I honestly never want to play with my niece. However, when I see her, my morals in my head get me moving and doing it often because.. its the right thing to do? I guess? I would feel terrible for not playing with her eventhough I dont want to, so I do it.

Another example is that Im at work right now. I absolutely dont want to be here and I was off. I picked this shift up because a coworker has a death in the family and no one else would come. No way in hell did I want to be here but here I am. I keep questioning why I even picked this shift up.

I also recently loaned money out to a friend who was in a major bind. No way in hell did I want to do that but once he told me his situation... I offered to help eventhough I didnt want to.

This is only a few examples of an endless list of examples. I cant tell if Im a good person or a piece of shit. If I didnt have decent morals then I wouldnt have done any of that. Since I dont want to do these things... then Im a bad person right? Doing it because your morals are kinda making you do it vs wanting to do it seems to be very different.

I dont know. Maybe Im overthinking this. I doubt anyone here will respond to this anyway.

Im on this journey right now improving my life. Im currently down about 150 pounds and still have a long way to go. However, it doesnt feel... real. Its weird. I dont feel that Im any lighter. When I look at myself in the mirror, I still see the same person I was when I started. Even when I check the scale, I question if it is even working. The main thing that lets know for Im changing is that my lose are fitting very loose. I honestly dont want to buy any new cloths because its the only confirmation of my progress I can feel.

Anyone else that has lost a significant amount of weight feel this way? I dont know if this is a mental issue Im having or its normal. I know this is kind of a niche question

Shablagoo posted...

Best sushi I ever had was cooked-beef seaweed rolls made by my best friends Korean aunt.

I hope it isnt too difficult to cook. Im not a chef by any means and if I consistently cook sushi terribly then... lets just say thats not good lmao

OK. Im going to try something different next week. This week Ill try just to not binge and prepare for next week.

I always wanted to get into grilling. My dad and older brother grill often but Ive never been formally taught by them how to grill. I think Im going to go buy a grill on my next pay day and learn. It can be something Ill look forward too on off days.

Im also going to take the time to learn how to grill some foods I really like but I buy from restaurants. They tend to be less health and I tend to buy too much. You would think I would buy too much for me to cook but I typically dont. Ill grill things like chicken, which I tend to buy fried on my days off since I dont have many places to buy chicken, as healthy of burgers I can make, etc.

I also want to try some crazy stuff. I tend to buy sushi but the deep fried sushi. Thats obviously bad. I like that sushi because its cooked, not because its fried. So maybe I can grill my sushi. I dont know if thats a thing lmao. I might try something else crazy like grilling a custom made healthy pizza on my off days. These things wont be my usual diet but I can eat foods I like but do it much healthier and at a reasonable calorie level thats not bingeing.

I know you guys didnt mention this but talking to you have me some new ideas to try. If they fail Ill just think of something else. Thanks for all the ideas and feedback. I truly appreciate it.

BenRoethlisberg posted...

It's easier to keep a consistent eating schedule during the work week when you're used to structure, so try and replicate that into your weekends.

For example, if you work from 9-12 on project A from 9-10, project B from 10-11, and project C from 11-12, then try replicating that on a saturday. Starting at 9, play Warzone. Then at 10, play Kingdom Hearts, Then at 11 to noon, play Smash bros. Then do lunch. Then do another rotation of whatever you do (the video games are just examples) for fun, so long as you structure your activities in a similar manner to whatever you do during a typical workday.

Then dinner, then normal evening stuff, then bed.

Structure goes a long way. Doing this will bring the structure into the weekend without actually bringing work over.

That sounds like a great idea. Ill try that out

Guide posted...

Well, you've started somewhere, so that's good. What are you comfortable with trying? I know some people are wary of therapists, for example.

Yea.. Im not big on theory. Im not big on talking to people about my problems in general. I dont take to my family or friends about my problems outside of rare occasions. In fact, I have 2 accounts that frequent CE and I made this account just to rarely ask CE questions about personal issues. Thats why it is called unknown. I dont want to be known.

I guess this just proved I have another issue I guess

Guide posted...

That'll fuck up your liver and kidneys, and your digestive system overall. It's a massive spike in system stress out of nowhere.

What have you tried, concerning these bingers?

This is the first thing solution Ive tried. Whats crazy is that when I binge on Sunday last week, I wasnt even hungry. I was just eating without thinking even after I was full. It didnt even cross my mind until the next day. I feel like this is better than before sticks I use to eat normal everyday with random binges once to twice a week but I know I have a problem

Ive been battling Obesity for a longtime. Ive finally gained control and Ive made major strides in losing weight. However, making major strides doesnt mean everything is great.

Here is my issue, I tend to eat great during the week and I have a binge problem on the weekend when Im usually off. Its been a problem for many months. Ive tried a new strategy last week where I look at my calories for the week, slightly reduce how much I eat for the first 3 days, then I fast for 2 days. After that I have more than enough calorie room on the weekend to binge both days if I want too.

I only did it 1 day last week but it feels like this strategy is sustainable. However... just because its sustainable... doesnt mean its healthy right? Will these strategy screw me up in the future?