Eating smoked salmon makes me think about how nice it'd be to be a bear

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Also very few bears actually have access to salmon. Most likely you're going to be lifting up boulders and eating all the insect grub hiding underneath. Mostly moth larva.
It says right here in Matthew 16:4 "Jesus doth not need a giant Mecha."
https://i.imgur.com/dQgC4kv.jpg