Should people Trust YOU in an Applebee's???

Nope

I'm gonna be that guy that clogs the toilet with whatever is available.

And then I'm going to complain about the temperature of my food.

My kids will be encouraged to throw whatever crap they can on the floor.

I will order elaborate drinks from the bar and then say they fucked it up and send it back.

And instead of a tip, I will leave an unscratched $1 lotto ticket.

Generally speaking, people shouldn't trust me period.

It's just microwaved food they serve right? So yeah I could probably do it.

If I end up inside an Applebees, something has gone terribly, terribly wrong. Run for the fucking hills.

No, because I will steal your fries when you aren't looking. I've done it in the past and I will do it again.