Current Events > So I spoke with my ex today.

(+) Yeah! (+)

lucariopikmin posted...

Care to back this up?

It's funny how you always leave out that you have admitted to lying about her.

I would basically allude to some trauma in her life that Im aware of as not necessarily an excuse but like what is causing some of these issues.

they would ask what kind of trauma.

ive only lied about identifiers, I didnt think that was relevant here, of course ima lie about identifiers if people want me to talk about her deepest darkest secrets publicly.

I mean, that pretty much seals the fact that she doesn't see you as a typical solo romantic partner type person. She might be poly, not sure. It's unfortunate when people aren't just willing to be honest with each other about intentions and whatnot.

Jeff_AKA_Snoopy posted...

I mean, that pretty much seals the fact that she doesn't see you as a typical solo romantic partner type person. She might be poly, not sure. It's unfortunate when people aren't just willing to be honest with each other about intentions and whatnot.

from my understanding of the time table.

She was causally dating him.

we started speaking again

they started to pick up steam and we started making plans to actually hang out and fix things (like all with in the same week)

she dated the both of us for like 2 weeks in which she started talking about us going officially (him a lot heavier though admittedly)

she asked me for the favors for her best friend (turned out to be for his birthday)

I found out

all hell broke loose.

I dont think she expected me to come around and she tried to make the best of it and failed miserably

Ok, so all giving you shit aside if any of this is remotely accurate just move on. Get some self respect and find someone that see you as more than an option, and actually has respect for you. Someone that cared about you and your feelings wouldnt be asking you to do favors for their new boyfriend that they like more than you.

Sounds like she was (rightfully so) put into a position of choosing between two potential partners and made it clear through her actions that she was going to prioritize this other relationship over the potential relationship with you.

But it's also interesting how at some point from your perspective you two were talking about having kids and marriage and whatnot while it also never being the most serious relationship? Just in my limited scope it kinda feels like the two of you were always figuring out if you were just "an option" for one another or the relationship you wanted to take that leap into with the kind of dedication, trust, and love that traditional monogamous relationships need.

Sucks when the relationship doesn't work out regardless though.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Oh sounds really weird

gamepimp12 posted...

I would basically allude to some trauma in her life that Im aware of as not necessarily an excuse but like what is causing some of these issues.

they would ask what kind of trauma.

So no, the person who admits to lying when it benefits him can't back his claim up.

gamepimp12 posted...

ive only lied about identifiers, I didnt think that was relevant here

The fact that you do lie is very relevant because it shows you're completely fine doing that at any point. Or are you seriously trying to argue that trump is also talking the truth when he goes "i'm not lying about this".

gamepimp12 posted...

She lied about a guy she was seeing so we could hang out, cause I refuse to hang out with her if she was dating someone else.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/a/a6c0cb3d.png

Sometimes people don't formally 'date', but drift together now and then and share a deep bond of affection. It's always complicated, occasionally awkward, and sometimes heartbreaking.

It happens. Whether it is happening in this particular case, I couldn't say.

lucariopikmin posted...

So no, the person who admits to lying when it benefits him can't back his claim up.

The fact that you do lie is very relevant because it shows you're completely fine doing that at any point. Or are you seriously trying to argue that trump is also talking the truth when he goes "i'm not lying about this".

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/a/a6c0cb3d.png

what does that post disprove about what I said

I knew she was dating around she lied about how serious it was.

i never cared about her dating around but i didnt want to be working on our relationship if shes already serious with someone else.

MotaroRIP619 posted...

Oh sounds really weird

hes kinda wrong about that

one of the reasons we never became official is because I didnt want to have a girlfriend who was going to leave state for med school..
Jeff_AKA_Snoopy posted...

Sounds like she was (rightfully so) put into a position of choosing between two potential partners and made it clear through her actions that she was going to prioritize this other relationship over the potential relationship with you.

But it's also interesting how at some point from your perspective you two were talking about having kids and marriage and whatnot while it also never being the most serious relationship? Just in my limited scope it kinda feels like the two of you were always figuring out if you were just "an option" for one another or the relationship you wanted to take that leap into with the kind of dedication, trust, and love that traditional monogamous relationships need.

Sucks when the relationship doesn't work out regardless though.

So thats because of two things.

Her own trauma causes her to self sabotage among other things.

I didnt feel ready for that step financially.

so we would talk about marriage and kids but it would be at this nebulous point in the future.

gamepimp12 posted...

So thats because of two things.

Her own trauma causes her to self sabotage among other things.

I didnt feel ready for that step financially.

so we would talk about marriage and kids but it would be at this nebulous point in the future.

You know I view that financial excuse as self sabotage as well. It really was an excuse.

I understand waiting for a certain financial stability for marriage, but not to make your relationship more official, especially because you somehow had enough money to keep buying expensive shoes.

Didn't you say that the last topic was going to be the last topic about her? >_>

Im friends with exactly zero of my exes, and theres a good reason for all of them.

Being friends with your exes seems like an unnecessary use of time and energy. One or both of you are always going to be thinking about your past when you see each other, no matter how noble either of you feel about being mature.

bsp77 posted...

You know I view that financial excuse as self sabotage as well. It really was an excuse.

I understand waiting for a certain financial stability for marriage, but not to make your relationship more official, especially because you somehow had enough money to keep buying expensive shoes.

so I mainly wanted my own place without a roommate and a new car.

and financially I was at the point I couldnt afford a good apartment (ie better or even close to the one I had) by myself

but had a lot of disposable income

car honestly was me refusing to buy a car in this economy

but yes to a certain extent I did shy away from the pressure we put on ourselves early in the relationship

LonelyStoner posted...

Im friends with exactly zero of my exes, and theres a good reason for all of them.

Being friends with your exes seems like an unnecessary use of time and energy. One or both of you are always going to be thinking about your past when you see each other, no matter how noble either of you feel about being mature.

Not necessarily true. My wife and I hang with a past ex of mine and her husband. No one is hung up at all.

I am kinda friends with another ex, but she might still have some issues seeing me.

Obviously, it just depends.

bsp77 posted...

Not necessarily true. My wife and I hang with a past ex of mine and her husband. No one is hung up at all.

I am kinda friends with another ex, but she might still have some issues seeing me.

Obviously, it just depends.

There are exceptions, thats true. My wife and I are friends with her first boyfriend, but him realizing he was gay shortly after they dated helps lol. He did her makeup and both of our hair at our wedding.

I think it is fair to have certain thresholds that you are comfortable with in order to move forward with a relationship. That in itself is fine.

It is also fine for the other person to say they are not comfortable with that benchmark and to move on.

Sounds to me like the whole situation was not "ideal" for both you and her regardless of when you looked at it and everyone moved on. Do so in a healthy way as well, learn from the experience.

gamepimp12 posted...

She felt like it wasnt worth the effort it was gonna take.

She was probably correct.

Gobstoppers12 posted...

She was probably correct.

Honestly I agree.

this last argument really changed the way we view each other.

and even prior to that it was so much baggage.

like I dont even blame her for picking the new dude over me. Hes new with no baggage.

if I was in her situation I would of done the same thing

well besides lie about the situation and play both sides.

This is the dumbest gimmick on this board

I havent spoken to my wife in three days I didnt want to interrupt her

Why are you ignoring the rest of my points? Finally realised that you can't actually argue against facts?

gamepimp12 posted...

what does that post disprove about what I said

"I refuse to hang out with her if she was dating someone else." You were literally making plans with her while knowing she was dating someone else.

gamepimp12 posted...

our relationship

It's called a friendship, you never had a relationship with her. She wasn't planning on dating you, the only thing you 2 did was have a very casual catch up talk.

gamepimp12 posted...

well besides lie about the situation

Yeah, you would rather sue her over a worthless gift. And let's not forget that you "thought" about contacting her sister you haven't seen in 4 years to ask her opinion on an actual relationship she has that you don't deserve to know anything about.

Youre trying really hard to catch me in this gotcha moment and honestly its kind of weird

are we about to argue the difference between going on dates with someone and seriously dating them as in building moving to a relationship

actually we arent cause Im just going to ignore you

gamepimp12 posted...

Youre trying really hard to catch me in this gotcha moment and honestly its kind of weird

are we about to argue the difference between going on dates with someone and seriously dating them as in building moving to a relationship

actually we arent cause Im just going to ignore you

He has 15 active posts on a 14 year old account. You did yourself a favor.

LonelyStoner posted...

He has 15 active posts on a 14 year old account. You did yourself a favor.

yeah like going to the archive site to prove that I was lying because I said I knew she was dating but didnt want her dating. Is a little much even for me.

like even trying to argue that is weird.

Can't believe TC is going to successfully milk another 200 posts about his asinine dating life.

Brother monogamy is not that hard.

Cemith posted...

Can't believe TC is going to successfully milk another 200 posts about his asinine dating life.

Brother monogamy is not that hard.

This is the most Ive dated this year honestly (7 or so women this year so far)

its been a journey Ive had a lot of crazy stories..

with my Ex I had admittedly grown pretty insecure which of course caused problems. But with everyone else they crazy

gamepimp12 posted...

But with everyone else they crazy

If you meet 5 people in a day, and one of them is crazy, chances are they're just crazy.

If you meet 5 people in a day, and all of them were crazy, the common denominator is you.

I mean I met more than that though just the women I ended up dating.