Current Events > Three years sober. AMA

Topic List
Page List: 1
TheLiarParadox
06/30/22 1:19:32 AM
#1:


AMA = Ask Me Anything

---
Spongebob is not a contraceptive.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Pepys Monster
06/30/22 1:22:34 AM
#2:


Did you have to stop hanging out with certain friends?

---
Ryzen 3700X | Evga GTX 1070 Ti | 16GB DDR4 3200 | Crucial MX500 2TB
... Copied to Clipboard!
TheBrainbuster
06/30/22 1:23:09 AM
#3:


Do you remember the exact date 3 years ago that you stopped? What happened to cause you to stop?

Was it cold turkey?

---
Final Fantasy IV is the greatest game ever MADE!!!
... Copied to Clipboard!
The_Creep_2020
06/30/22 1:23:13 AM
#4:


Whats the hardest part of staying sober?

Whats the most rewarding part of staying sober?

---
All that I am and all I'll ever be is a brain in a body.
... Copied to Clipboard!
TheLiarParadox
06/30/22 3:42:53 AM
#5:


Pepys Monster posted...
Did you have to stop hanging out with certain friends?
Yeah. There are some people I still won't go around because the only interest we had in each other was getting drunk together. After three or four "come have drinks with us!" "nah but we can go see a movie or something" "oh yeah for sure I'll hit you up *ghost*" conversations, the friendship shriveled up and are functionally over. I've also had some people say they miss the "old me." Those friendships died on the spot.

I've settled into a new normal with most people though and everything's pretty good. COVID-19 is really the only thing that's keeping me from fully re-integrating and doing all the things I'd like to do.

TheBrainbuster posted...
Do you remember the exact date 3 years ago that you stopped? What happened to cause you to stop?

Was it cold turkey?
The 30th is the first day I know for sure I didn't drink and it was cold turkey from that point on.

I don't think I can be too detailed but in short, the depressive effects of alcohol became unbearable and I almost made an extremely permanent choice the morning after my last night out partying. Freaked me the fuck out and I knew I had to change, and soon.

The_Creep_2020 posted...
Whats the hardest part of staying sober?
All the triggers, especially at first. It's not just the obvious things, like stressful situations, being around drinking buddies, seeing beer commercials, or hearing party songs, either. Really nonsensical things can become associated with the habit and there can be these Pavlovian reactions that have to be examined and altered.

The smell of Burger King, for example, triggered BAD cravings in me at first. I had eaten BK like once in the entire decade leading up to getting sober because it had become disgusting to me. The first time it happened, I was stuck in a car with someone eating it and I thought maybe the craving was because of irritability and being stressed by smelling something I didn't like, but subsequent instances in more favorable circumstances proved it was something deeper.

After a bit of analyzing the situation, it dawned on me that my favorite beer store was next to a BK and even though I never consciously made note of the smell, my addicted-ass brain sure did. It was background "noise" to me because I was 100% focused on the alcohol and nothing else mattered but a decade of that smell preceding alcohol consumption conditioned me without me even realizing it. That resulted in the smell becoming a very powerful trigger once the process wasn't completed. It was like my brain was blueballed by the BK smell.

There are lots of things like that, some I probably can't overcome and just have to work through, which required a robust coping system for life in general. I've been fortunate enough to develop that and can generally disarm any cravings that might arise without much issue. It's still something I'll probably have to be mindful of for the rest of my life.

Whats the most rewarding part of staying sober?
Knowing that no matter how crappy my life may seem at times or how awful I might feel, I'm at least not adding a whole other layer of unnecessary bullshit on top of it all with alcohol.

---
Spongebob is not a contraceptive.
... Copied to Clipboard!
DrizztLink
06/30/22 3:48:20 AM
#6:


TheLiarParadox posted...
After a bit of analyzing the situation, it dawned on me that my favorite beer store was next to a BK and even though I never consciously made note of the smell, my addicted-ass brain sure did.
It'll do that, the bastard.

I once went on a major relapse bender because I drank one mouthful of black cherry soda and it reminded me of 99 Black Cherry.

---
http://guidesmedia.ign.com/guides/9846/images/slowpoke.gif https://i.imgur.com/M8h2ATe.png
https://i.imgur.com/6ezFwG1.png
... Copied to Clipboard!
DespondentDeity
06/30/22 6:43:51 AM
#7:


Hey man thats awesome to hear. If Im reading that right, I quit for the same reason.

How would you say that maintaining sobriety has impacted your ability to find fulfillment in life?

---
SHE: In black of night, a die is cast, heavens overflow with stars
HER: All is light, all is ash, you must become just as you are
... Copied to Clipboard!
whitelytning
06/30/22 7:06:09 AM
#8:


Good for you man. Keep at it.

Was there an incident that made for stop?

Did you try prior to this time?

I have a friend that is going through this and has been sober for about a year now. Whats the best way to help?


---
************************************************
http://i.imgur.com/iZdWIKJ.jpg
... Copied to Clipboard!
TheLiarParadox
06/30/22 11:50:16 AM
#9:


DrizztLink posted...
It'll do that, the bastard.

I once went on a major relapse bender because I drank one mouthful of black cherry soda and it reminded me of 99 Black Cherry.
Damn.

I was really worried about that for a long time but once I got into the groove of things, tastes and smells stopped bothering me so much. I actually have had a few NA beers and hop flavored sparkling waters without much issue, other than the exorbitant prices. Turns out all that money I spent on "upscale" alcohol really was just for the drunkening because I have a hard time justify buying it for taste

DespondentDeity posted...
Hey man thats awesome to hear. If Im reading that right, I quit for the same reason.

How would you say that maintaining sobriety has impacted your ability to find fulfillment in life?
I'm finally starting to get out of my own way, and not just because I don't have to deal with the fallout of drinking. I know myself better than ever and have a very clear and comprehensive assessment of my abilities and limitations. Some barriers have fallen and I've been rewarded for getting out of my comfort zone while I've had to put up new fences and accept that some things just aren't for me. I no longer beat myself up or cause turmoil by aspiring to obvious dead ends. Frees up the mind quite a bit and lets me put my best foot forward.

whitelytning posted...
Good for you man. Keep at it.

Was there an incident that made for stop?

Did you try prior to this time?

I have a friend that is going through this and has been sober for about a year now. Whats the best way to help?
Thanks.

I don't think I can be too detailed but in short, the depressive effects of alcohol became unbearable and I almost made an extremely permanent choice the morning after my last night out partying. Freaked me the fuck out and I knew I had to change, and soon.

I quit for a few months in 2018, then quit and relapsed monthly throughout the first half of 2019.

The r/stopdrinking subreddit was a tremendous boon for me. The book "This Naked Mind" by Annie Grace was very important for me. I also went to AA for a bit, which was a good starting point but not something I stuck with long term. A few of the first six steps were very revelatory for me though.

---
Spongebob is not a contraceptive.
... Copied to Clipboard!
TheBrainbuster
06/30/22 11:52:09 AM
#10:


TheLiarParadox posted...
The 30th is the first day I know for sure I didn't drink and it was cold turkey from that point on.

I don't think I can be too detailed but in short, the depressive effects of alcohol became unbearable and I almost made an extremely permanent choice the morning after my last night out partying. Freaked me the fuck out and I knew I had to change, and soon.

Sweet

---
Final Fantasy IV is the greatest game ever MADE!!!
... Copied to Clipboard!
Ruvan22
06/30/22 12:14:21 PM
#12:


I don't have a question but just wanted to say you've done some awesome work!
... Copied to Clipboard!
Lost_All_Senses
06/30/22 12:16:15 PM
#13:


TheLiarParadox posted...
. I had eaten BK like once in the entire decade leading up to getting sober because it had become disgusting to me.

Ah, the Ironman tactic to becoming sober

---
Name checks out
"I don't wanna be the toughest, I just keep it 100 and think nothin of it"- Black Thought
... Copied to Clipboard!
TheLiarParadox
07/01/22 10:27:22 AM
#14:


Lost_All_Senses posted...
Ah, the Ironman tactic to becoming sober
Nah it just made me quit eating at BK. Still got drunk as hell for a long time after that but I do understand his perspective. On top of being a morbidly obese food addict, I was hungover and starving since I wouldn't eat leading up to drinking and that BK burger was still fucking gross. I didn't even finish it and threw it away. It was one of the few times I've ever been compelled to do that with food that wasn't noticeably spoiled, to give an idea of how terrible it was.

---
Spongebob is not a contraceptive.
... Copied to Clipboard!
Topic List
Page List: 1