Current Events > Lovefaqs update: how's it going?

(+) Yeah! (+)

How's your love life?

I have no girlfriend. I have a potential date on Bumble, but her kid was just exposed to covid so they're quarantining.

Well I had my whole topic about it last week.

She withdrew after NYE, hasn't reached out, yet paradoxically seems totally fine and comfortable with me when I see her in person at work or w.e.

So I guess things are over and I'm single, but at least its pleasant?

Oh, I missed your topic. Summary?

got covid right after NYE and havent left the condo since

I've never been in a relationship or done anything other than make-out with another girl, but I'm finally out of the closet as a trans girl and lesbian presenting as myself in life and on dating sites.

1) I have a redheaded coworker who is really attractive and personable, and I tried asking her to hang out back in the summer and she turned me down cold. But I eventually got over it and kept talking to her. She's been super affirming and we were talking hot sauces and spiciness levels and she mentioned she had gone to a new Korean BBQ place a few towns over and that it was great and then she blurted out, "We should go there some time." I got the impression she was as surprised by that as I was. I kind of get the vibe that she's straight though, or, at least, she certainly seems to think she is. We'll see, I guess. Women are just great in general though.

2) I'm messaging with a pretty Chinese American girl I matched with on Hinge. Just chatting back and forth since yesterday. We spent a lot of time talking about food.

dj1200 posted...

How's your love life?

Still dead. Has been for a long time and will be for the foreseeable future.

dj1200 posted...

Oh, I missed your topic. Summary?

Cliffnotes:

Seeing a girl casually since Oct

Known her as a friend for years prior

Things seem to be going well

We drift/don't hang out through the holidays because of life/busy shit

Asks my plans on NYE, I respond, she never reads the messages (or does but doesn't go into the app to do so), I send Happy New Year message, same deal

Send 3 followup messages over the course of the next several days being like "?" "hey?", same deal

Ask her at work what's up, she seems genuinely confused that I think she has a problem with me, mentions she's not reading messages or hanging out with anyone rn

We get along at work but I've made no additional effort to talk/make plans outside of that and neither has she so

I actually haven't been looking. After my last relationship ended, I figured I'd wait a while before I jumped into another relationship. Then Covid hit and I haven't wanted to deal with meeting random women through all of this.

Now I'm looking into going back to college virtually to get my bachelors. So even if covid stops being a concern, I might end up waiting until after I finish that, before I get back into dating. Depends on how well I'm able to balance work and school.

NoxObscuras posted...

I actually haven't been looking. After my last relationship ended, I figured I'd wait a while before I jumped into another relationship. Then Covid hit and I haven't wanted to deal with meeting random women through all of this.

Now I'm looking into going back to college virtually to get my bachelors. So even if covid stops being a concern, I might end up waiting until after I finish that, before I get back into dating. Depends on how well I'm able to balance work and school.

why do you want your bachelors? iirc you have a p good job

Have been dating my girlfriend since mid October. We met on Bumble. Before her I had been dating this crazy alcoholic since last February, but we broke up in September. At least the sex was good.

Current girlfriend is wonderful, and super inspiring. Shes a doctor whos super ambitious, and we have a great time together. Go on lots of runs and bike rides together. Signed up for the ms150 race in late April to do together.

plus the sex is phenomenal so I have zero to complain about.

I have a wonderful partner I am very in love with; Im also poly, so I had a date last Thursday from Tinder that went very well. Unfortunately, they had asymptomatic covid from their roommate who got symptoms AFTER our date, and now Ive got covid. So our next date is postponed, as well as a date with another person I met on Bumble.

All in all things are good, aside from the whole covid thing.

OliviaWildThing posted...

why do you want your bachelors? iirc you have a p good job

I do yeah. The degree basically just let's me promote faster and start at higher pay.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

A doorway to more pain.

So baby dont hurt me no more.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


oh man, that's rough. you guys still together I'm assuming since you said your gf?

dj1200 posted...

Oh, I missed your topic. Summary?

The thread hit 500!

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Baby, don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

So sorry. Are you going to try to patch it up?

Never had one. So, I suppose never better in a way.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Then maybe moving on is best. My marriage ended 5 years ago, and we had been together 20 years total. My life is much better now.

I got a handy in a bar a few nights ago. Random babe.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

I met my ex wife at 19 and she was my first in every usage of the word "first" (and a mutual friend set us up). So I was 40 years old and had basically never dated in my life. But I learned it and made the best of it, and had a ridiculously crazy midlife crisis. Not saying you should do that per se, but just saying you can learn and much of it is what you make of it.

My girlfriend of five months turned out to be an alcoholic which I knew by month 2 but didn't know she was sneaking it every chance she had while also arguing with me about everything and be insanely defensive on it. Discovered a handle in her backpack checked her phone and found out she was freezing out her friends who knew her problem to try to hang out with people who didn't or wanted to take advantage of her getting that blasted.

Very awesome. Broke up with her and she was crushed. We talked a bunch I gave seeing her casually a try then she turned things around to me having anger issues and being furious about everything especially her, which uhhhh I had some doubts on so I just told her I didn't think either of us were having fun with this. Tried to convince herself into pregnancy, does not appear to have worked. We went our separate ways and sometimes she will text me and I will either not respond or do so with one word.

It seems like I get half the matches on apps I did before this summer. And those I match with are uhhhh either not promising and I let it trickle off or just doesn't go anywhere.

Been on two dates since breakup, one of them I may as well have dated a homeless person as I paid then she slept in my bed we didn't hook up or anything, then I kicked her out and haven't heard from her since, which, thank christ.

Second was alright, we had a lot of the same interests but she was too shy and like boring. We did some light smooching then I guess I kinda ghosted her. For some reason I couldn't muster the effort to just be like hey this isn't gonna happen.

Most recently I had this cool back and forth with a paisano cutie, we agreed to go out after the holidays then she never responded to my post New Years text or the shitpost Seinfeld meme I sent after. Since then, it has been a desert.

Drunk Cobra posted...

My girlfriend of five months turned out to be an alcoholic which I knew by month 2 but didn't know she was sneaking it every chance she had while also arguing with me about everything and be insanely defensive on it. Discovered a handle in her backpack checked her phone and found out she was freezing out her friends who knew her problem to try to hang out with people who didn't or wanted to take advantage of her getting that blasted.

Very awesome. Broke up with her and she was crushed. We talked a bunch I gave seeing her casually a try then she turned things around to me having anger issues and being furious about everything especially her, which uhhhh I had some doubts on so I just told her I didn't think either of us were having fun with this. Tried to convince herself into pregnancy, does not appear to have worked. We went our separate ways and sometimes she will text me and I will either not respond or do so with one word.

It seems like I get half the matches on apps I did before this summer. And those I match with are uhhhh either not promising and I let it trickle off or just doesn't go anywhere.

Been on two dates since breakup, one of them I may as well have dated a homeless person as I paid then she slept in my bed we didn't hook up or anything, then I kicked her out and haven't heard from her since, which, thank christ.

Second was alright, we had a lot of the same interests but she was too shy and like boring. We did some light smooching then I guess I kinda ghosted her. For some reason I couldn't muster the effort to just be like hey this isn't gonna happen.

Most recently I had this cool back and forth with a paisano cutie, we agreed to go out after the holidays then she never responded to my post New Years text or the shitpost Seinfeld meme I sent after. Since then, it has been a desert.

Jeez. Is it sad that part of misses this insanity? There is just something about knowing anything could happen in any given night.

No. The ups and downs of a lunatic are always like insanely fun ups. I agree with you there.

Drunk Cobra posted...

No. The ups and downs of a lunatic are always like insanely fun ups. I agree with you there.

I actually worry sometimes that I am going to be a fucking moron and dump my extremely wonderful gf because I miss the thrill of the chase. I am sure I would regret that though.

Alcoholism is really tragic. Really, any addiction is a kind of Jekyll and Hyde deal. The addiction overpowers them: theyll do or say increasingly extreme things to justify themselves, including denial and projection. And the awful thing is, unless they choose to help themselves, theres not a thing you can do.

I hooked up with my current FWB on Monday. Then had an awesome date with a new girl on Tuesday, and she invited me over to her place this upcoming Saturday night. So my week started well and will hopefully also end well!

SauI_Goodman posted...

I got a handy in a bar a few nights ago. Random babe.

I've never gotten a handy to completion.
Any future with the girl?

bsp77 posted...

I actually worry sometimes that I am going to be a fucking moron and dump my extremely wonderful gf because I miss the thrill of the chase. I am sure I would regret that though.

Oof. I truly feel for all the people who didnt get taught there were ethical options other than monogamy. Our societies insistence on monogamy as the default is super harmful.

dj1200 posted...

I've never gotten a handy to completion.
Any future with the girl?

We did not exchange info. Bought her a few drinks and next thing i know her hand is down my pants. We were in the back thankfully lol not too many people around.

Zonbei posted...

Oof. I truly feel for all the people who didnt get taught there were ethical options other than monogamy. Our societies insistence on monogamy as the default is super harmful.

It isn't about ethics. I like monogamy. Unfortunately, I like serial monogamy with random hookups in between.

But more power to people who can do polygamy. Everyone can have their own thing.

I hope I will settle. I think it is just 20 years in the same unhealthy relationship that caused this.

SauI_Goodman posted...

We did not exchange info. Bought her a few drinks and next thing i know her hand is down my pants. We were in the back thankfully lol not too many people around.

Nice

Edit: not sarcasm

Girlfriend and I have just passed six months. :)

Haven't seen her since just before Christmas, tho. ;_;

We're going up to visit my folks in NH this weekend.

CyricZ posted...

Girlfriend and I have just passed six months. :)

Haven't seen her since just before Christmas, tho. ;_;

We're going up to visit my folks in NH this weekend.

Why so long? Regardless, enjoy NH and congrats on 6 months

bsp77 posted...

Why so long?

We both went to different places for the holidays and she caught COVID while she travelled. Just basically got over it this past weekend, and I was at MAGFest this past weekend.

CyricZ posted...

We both went to different places for the holidays and she caught COVID while she travelled. Just basically got over it this past weekend, and I was at MAGFest this past weekend.

Oh yeah! I forgot about MAGFest. How did that go? Was the turn out for your tutorial good?

ElatedVenusaur posted...

Alcoholism is really tragic. Really, any addiction is a kind of Jekyll and Hyde deal. The addiction overpowers them: theyll do or say increasingly extreme things to justify themselves, including denial and projection. And the awful thing is, unless they choose to help themselves, theres not a thing you can do.

Yeah, thanks. I thought she was doing pretty well when we started seeing eachother again but she really like went nuts there, so I never figured out if she was still able to keep off the alcohol or not. Sucks because those first couple months were really some of the most fun I've had in a relationship. I started therapy but think I'm gonna have to switch therapists because mine last week started going off about how the Biden administration rules by fear and we're all going to get covid anyway when I offhandedly mentioned going out less because of omnicron.

small yikes.

NoxObscuras posted...

Oh yeah! I forgot about MAGFest. How did that go? Was the turn out for your tutorial good?

MAGFest was great! So far out of 10000 people that went, they have 59 positive cases of Covid, so I'd consider that a success, especially considering everyone was vaccinated.

I had a little over forty people show up for my mahjong panel, so I'll call that a success. :)

bsp77 posted...

It isn't about ethics. I like monogamy. Unfortunately, I like serial monogamy with random hookups in between.

But more power to people who can do polygamy. Everyone can have their own thing.

I hope I will settle. I think it is just 20 years in the same unhealthy relationship that caused this.

I think you completely misunderstood what I meant when I included ethical in there.

My point was that people can both be in committed relationships and still enjoy the thrill of the chase, if they arent in a monogamous relationship, and that people are raised with compulsory monogamy so they never even get the chance to choose how they want to have their relationships.

Yikes. Good luck.

Cool

Zonbei posted...

I think you completely misunderstood what I meant when I included ethical in there.

My point was that people can both be in committed relationships and still enjoy the thrill of the chase, if they arent in a monogamous relationship, and that people are raised with compulsory monogamy so they never even get the chance to choose how they want to have their relationships.

I understand completely. It just isn't for me.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Good luck regardless. Divorce is sometimes the best thing that can happen, even if it doesn't feel that way at the moment

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