Board 8 > Anagram Ranks 145 Waifus: The Top 22

(+) Yeah! (+)

I am actually going insane trying to determine where I screwed up in the ranking system again, I thought I was on the top 20. I know I made a mistake somewhere, but damned if I can find it.

Oh well, I'll continue the topic probably tomorrow. This will surely be the final topic in the series.

The Waifus so Far
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/19dm1bshy_1BMGiAgisHuuEjYupRxlf2jLu7AJtWAgmI/edit?usp=sharing

Top 22 Waifus
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1HPqfwIb_d-QmurNyLRK_SfZ71mixQamqMuHJ4LMyC5I/edit?usp=sharing

The Waifus Remaining for those who don't want to read the spreadsheet
Melia Antiqua (Xenoblade)
Fiora (Xenoblade)
Makoto Nijima (Persona)
Mitsuru Kirijo (Persona)
Tae Takemi (Persona)
Tifa Lockhart (Final Fantasy)
Lunafreya Nox Fleuret (Final Fantasy)
Miu Iruma (Danganronpa)
Ibuki Mioda (Danganronpa)
Chiaki Nanami (Danganronpa)
Sonia Nevermind (Danganronpa)
Kaede Akamatasu (Danganronpa)
Aoi Asahina (Danganronpa)
Betty Cooper (Archie)
Zelda (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild)
Lucina (Fire Emblem)
Ema Skye (Ace Attorney)
Christie Monteiro (Tekken)
Mai Natsume (BlazBlue)
Rapunzel (Tangled)
Claire Redfield (Resident Evil)
Palutena (Kid Icarus)

Overall Remaining Waifu Stats
Medium
Video Game: 20
Comic: 1
Film: 1

Hair
Blonde: 8
Brown: 6
Blue: 3
Black: 1
Green: 1
Purple: 1
Red: 1
Silver: 1

Eyes
Blue: 7
Green: 5
Brown: 3
Pink: 2
Purple: 2
Red: 2
Black: 1

Age
15-19: 15
20-29: 7

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tag

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Danganronpa supremacy.

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There's five of the best DR waifus in there and then Miu.

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Part of me wants to say that of course I nominated the best of the six. Part of me thinks that Anagram's system will not work in her favor when one of them is literally the "ultimate princess."

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Sheep007 posted...

There's five of the best DR waifus in there and then Ibuki.

ftfy

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Pretty solid group of waifus left. I would've nommed Tifa myself if someone hadn't beaten me to it. Maybe Makoto, too.

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Age
15-19: 15
20-29: 7

Pedoratio: 15/7 = 2.142857

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Leonhart4 posted...

They're based on how the Thought Entity thinks humans behave, so yeah, they're definitely imperfect representations because it doesn't understand humanity that well.

Good, that's what I thought was going on.

Brayze_II posted...

Age
15-19: 15
20-29: 7

Pedoratio: 15/7 = 2.142857

I actually didn't instantly understand that you'd combined pedo and ratio and thought that was some math term I didn't recognize for a second.

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My best guess for the hint is Aoi.

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I'm gonna not overthink this and just guess Mai for the hint.

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Could be Claire Redfield

xp1337 posted...

My best guess for the hint is Aoi.

Donut's not a color.

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Tag.

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Tag.

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22 (for real this time). Lunafreya Nox Fleuret

Series: Final Fantasy
Nominator: WhiteLens (0/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: No
Attractiveness: 90 (8/145 tie)
Personality: 60 (60/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 70 (38/145 tie)
Overall Waifu Score: 73.3
Hair: Blonde (7/62 remaining)
Eyes: Blue (6/45 remaining)
Race: White (8/62 remaining)
Age: 20-29 (6/59 remaining)
Medium: Video Game (19/85 remaining)

And so goes the final waifu whose game/movie/book I havent played/watched/read. What a tragedy. Even more of a tragedy is how I had to parse through a bunch of FFXV spoilers for this review! I probably should have vetoed Luna as a nomination, but its okay.

If I had a category for stupidest name, Luna wins. Nothing even comes close to it. TaliZorah nar Rayaa at least sounds like an alien name. Sunset Shimmer at least sounds like a name for a character aimed at little kids. Lunas name combines three different languages and a ton of different conflicting sounds to produce something that does not sound elegant at all. Im just going to quickly go through a list of FFXV and find who the most important character is whose name isnt stupid Noctis Lucis Caelem, Prompto Argentum, Gladiolus Amicitia, Ignis Scientia, Iedolas Aldercapt, Cindy Aurum. Ill accept Cids name. I have to believe that Japanese people just cant tell how bad these names sound, right? Because they dont sound like proper Latin names, they sound like a fifteen-year-old who doesnt understand Latin smashing sounds together. Bah, enough of that.

One thing I learned while researching Luna that actually scored her a ha, thats neat point for attractiveness is that her hairstyle is technically possible in real life. Square hired a professional to make a needlessly complicated hairstyle that would require a handmaiden in order to actually have, in order to imply her nobility. See, I like that kind of neato sort-of subtle worldbuilding stuff. Oh, also, shes obviously very beautiful in that classical princess sort of way. They really nailed the modern princess sort of look like they were going for, so good on them. Final Fantasy is always reliable for that sort of polish. Too bad the games started sucking after FFX, but oh well. And dont tell me FFXII is good, because we both know its mediocre at best.

So, the important part about Lunas personality is that shes the princessiest princess who's ever princessed. Shes the most regal, most prim, and most caring and pure and loving and self-sacrificing princess ever. There are actually a lot of princesses on this list (counting only formal princesses and queens, its Elsa, Nyx, Toriel, Angela, Rosalina, Daisy, Luna, Sonia, Melia, Lucina, Rapunzel, Zelda, and Morrigan, with a number of quasi-examples like Karma, Lyndis, and Palutena, Yuffie, and Mothra), and Luna is the most princess-y of them all. Certain incarnations of Zelda might have beaten her, but we specifically had BotW Zelda nominated. Even before I looked it up, I knew the Japanese version had to have her using that super formal speech pattern (I think its called keigo?). Like, I didnt even need to look up her history section in the Wiki to know that she was so ****ing dead. No way a too good for this sinful Earth character like that survives the game.

I guess what Im getting at here is that Luna works better as a symbol than specifically a waifu? I know that she has imperfections (the Wiki even specifically mentions that the writer wrote in moments where she isnt perfect to make her more relatable), but they're very minor, and she just comes across as so regal that its almost sort of overwhelming? Like, I guess what Im saying is that the more regal and formal you are, the less relatable and connectable to other people you can be. Even when shes being determined and argumentative and trying to help others, Luna's still super, super formal, like theres just a barrier between her and anyone who could ever be normal. Which is great for a leader or a magical oracle responsible for protecting the world from darkness, but its going to be something of a limiting factor if youre a waifu? Im wondering how much of this might just be her accent, because she sounds like the Queen of England. Like, theres a translator out there who said we cant replicate the Japanese super formal honorific system, so the next best thing is an RP British accent.

So, if none of that is a factor for you, then shes probably a top tier waifu. But I like my princesses a little less regal and a little more normal? I dont know. Im going to come off as such a ****ing hypocrite once we get to Melia, but oh well.

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Next Up: A waifu whose first and last name have the same number of syllables

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Anagram posted...

Next Up: A waifu whose first and last name have the same number of syllables

This is a bad hint because it applies to like half the remaining list!

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Anagram posted...

And dont tell me FFXII is good

It's not just good; it's great!

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Ma-Ko-To Nii-Ji-ma

Oh no!

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LordoftheMorons posted...

It's not just good; it's great!

Damn right.

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FFXII is fine, but it's basically carried on the shoulders of 4 or 5 characters.

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Not_an_Owl posted...

This is a bad hint because it applies to like half the remaining list!

Melia Antiqua (Xenoblade)
Makoto Nijima (Persona)
Mitsuru Kirijo (Persona)
Tifa Lockhart (Final Fantasy)
Ibuki Mioda (Danganronpa)
Chiaki Nanami (Danganronpa)
Betty Cooper (Archie)
and not Claire Redfield (Resident Evil), oops

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...how are you pronouncing Claire?

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Inviso posted...

...how are you pronouncing Claire?

Clah-eer

The French way

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Mistakes will happen.

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This forced me to read a synopsis of her princessly involvement in whatever the plot of FFXV is, and boy was it dumb as hell

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The way I pronounce Claire has only one syllable.

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Inviso posted...

...how are you pronouncing Claire?

"Light-ning"

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FF15 has the honor of being the only Final Fantasy game I quit while playing

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I haven't played FF XV but your write-up sounds accurate.

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_stingers_ posted...

FF15 has the honor of being the only Final Fantasy game I quit while playing

Man, I've quit a ton of them, and rarely because I dislike them!

(Usually I quit unintentionally by getting distracted by another game while in the middle of trying to get through all of the sidequests near the end and never actually go back and actually beat the final boss)

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21. Betty Cooper

Series: Archie
Nominator: Eddv (0/4 remaining)
Personal Familiarity: Yes
Attractiveness: 79 (26/145 tie)
Personality: 67 (38/145 tie)
Girlfriendness: 75 (25/145)
Overall Waifu Score: 73.6
Hair: Blonde (7/27 remaining)
Eyes: Black (0/9 remaining)
Race: White (7/61 remaining)
Age: 15-19 (14/62 remaining)
Medium: Comic (0/3 remaining)

Betty Cooper is the Platonic ideal of girl next door. Alright, waifu ranking over not really, but it is true. Shes almost comically on-point. If I was going to parody a girl next door character, I could just drop Betty into the story and leave her as-is. Im gonna level with you: I never thought I had a thing for the girl next door archetype, but Betty is barely in the top three of them on this list. Tifa and Fiora are yet to show up. But regardless, in the eternal battle of Betty vs Veronica, mark me down as a Betty supporter.

Its honestly a little difficult to even describe her personality more specifically. Betty is just so sunny and fun and genuinely smart that its hard to imagine any serious problems in a relationship with her unless youre balancing your time between her and her best friend. Although, is she supposed to be a tomboy? Because TVTropes lists her as one, and Ive never gotten that impression. Not any girl who likes sports is automatically a tomboy, dammit. But regardless, yes Betty comes across as very talented, as a mechanic, student, and athlete, which is to her benefit. She isnt one of those high school waifus who has a definite career planned for adulthood, but its fine. Im still counting mechanic as a great waifu job, Im terrible with car problems anyway, so this really works out well. And shes a cook? Did Veronica get the money, and Betty get everything else? Because I really enjoy how Betty is supposed to feel insecure about Veronica being much richer than her, which manifests exclusively in the latter buying a lot of expensive useless crap. Betty, that is to your benefit.

Jesus, this Wiki. It starts a paragraph by saying that Veronica can play the organ while Betty can only play the tambourine, then in the same paragraph says that she can play the maracas, guitar, banjo, keyboard, saxophone, cello, bongos, and recorder. Im not a musician, but it feels to me like saxophones and cellos require way more skill than the other things, right? Whereas Veronicas only listed instrument definitely requires skill. What Im saying is that there are a few continuity errors in this 80-year-old series. And honestly look, I understand joining a garage band with your friends, thats fine, but you let Archie name it the Archies? Have some self-respect.

Parenthetically, according to the Wiki, Bettys eyes are supposed to be blue, but theyre also listed as brown, but theyre always drawn as black dots. I counted her as black-eyed for purposes of the list. Like, regardless, Betty hits all of my waifu attractiveness buttons, so she got pretty high in that category. I like blonde hair, I like ponytails, I like casual dress, its all good. I looked up a bunch of pictures of her, and I didnt realize she originally had that, I dont know the word for it, 1950s housewife hairstyle? Switching to a ponytail was 100% the right call.

I mean, I havent read a ton of Archie comics, but Ive read a few. I dont remember them being as insane as the Wiki implies? Im sorry to keep going back to the Wiki instead of talking about Betty as a waifu, but I think Ive already covered the essentials and I want to talk about this part, where an encyclopedia bonks her on the head, giving her psychic powers and making her miserable because she psychically knew Archie would one day dump her for Veronica, only for her to lose the powers and be happy even though she already learned the important fact for her dating life, like, what is this?

Lastly, I want to mention the only thing listed under the Notes section for Betty in the Wiki:

NOTES

• Betty Cooper is a canon character in the Archie series.

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Next Up: The only waifu remaining with a sub-40 score in any category, for real this time

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Is Archie a harem manga?

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I feel like this one either has to be Miu or Ibuki.

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Not_an_Owl posted...

Is Archie a harem manga?

The originator of the genre

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Inviso posted...

I feel like this one either has to be Miu or Ibuki.

I can't see any of Anagram's rankings for Ibuki being sub-40. I wouldn't have expected her to hang on this long because I'd expect them all to be very median, but Miu's personality has got to be lower, right? Plus, with a sub-40, you need to have high stats elsewhere, and I think she certainly hits on the attractiveness meter. Girlfriendness would be a real mixed bag depending on which qualities he chose to emphasize, but world-famous inventor seems like a job that would carry.

Actually, to take it one step further, tying Betty would require a total score of 220.8, so if we assume one score is 39, the other two have to average 91, and that's a best-case scenario. Would Miu be able to pull a girlfriendness rating of 91? (Or technically at least 82 if attractiveness is 100.) Somehow I doubt it.

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...Claire if she gets hit with the "dangerous job" penalty that has been handed out to adventurers?

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xp1337 posted...

...Claire if she gets hit with the "dangerous job" penalty that has been handed out to adventurers?

I mean, by that argument, Tifa's a terrorist. And she'd have no trouble rating highly on all three categories otherwise.

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azuarc posted...

I mean, by that argument, Tifa's a terrorist. And she'd have no trouble rating highly on all three categories otherwise.

Excuse me, she's a revolutionary

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For whatever it's worth, Tifa's ranking will account only for FF7 and not FF7R, since it's not on PC yet.

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azuarc posted...

I mean, by that argument, Tifa's a terrorist. And she'd have no trouble rating highly on all three categories otherwise.

look midgar has got some problems but zombie outbreaks aren't one of them

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Anagram posted...

For whatever it's worth, Tifa's ranking will account only for FF7 and not FF7R, since it's not on PC yet.

Well she was still a terrorist in the original game, so that doesn't matter.
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Mewtwo59 posted...

Well she was still a terrorist in the original game, so that doesn't matter.

Excuse me, freedom fighter.

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Leonhart4 posted...

Excuse me, freedom fighter.

Only a matter of perspective.

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azuarc posted...

Only a matter of perspective.

Oh sorry, didn't realize we had President Shinra on the line

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Avalanche called themselves terrorists in FF7.
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Mac Arrowny posted...

Avalanche called themselves terrorists in FF7.

No, they didn't. Barret would never think of himself that way.

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There goes Betty. Goodbye, Betty.

I'm a little surprised that she's not right at the top, because she's practically the perfect waifu, but I'm not the one ranking 160-odd characters.