Current Events > Scenario: You find out your child was accidentally switched at birth.

(+) Yeah! (+)

I didn't want to derail the single mother topic with this so I brought it here.

After 12 years of raising your child, you decide to get a DNA test after hearing enough advertisements for them on the podcasts you listen to. You get the triple pack so that you have complete results for you, your wife, and your kid. You're shocked to find that your kids ancestry doesn't match up with yours. You start to boil with rage,sensing infidelity, but then notice that the kid doesn't match your wife either.

Sleuthing ensues and you discover that the hospital mixed up the babies at birth.

What do you do? How do you feel?

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I would try to get to know my bio kid but I'd probably feel more bonded with the one I raised

also this was a Lifetime movie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gILG6_VarY

Zikten posted...

I would try to get to know my bio kid but I'd probably feel more bonded with the one I raised

Their parents aren't interested in giving you more than yearlyish contact.

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I... honestly don't know

I could never adopt a kid or have a kid that wasn't biologically mine. I know deep down a part of me would be thinking "you're not mine". So in this instance, I'm pretty sure my brain would break.

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I wonder how often that happens.

EDIT

Just saw post 3. I would just explain to the kid what happened. He can't be mad at me if it wasn't my fault.

TreyFlowers posted...

I... honestly don't know

I could never adopt a kid or have a kid that wasn't biologically mine. I know deep down a part of me would be thinking "you're not mine". So in this instance, I'm pretty sure my brain would break.

Why though? Like...don't you feel that's a little fucked up? That you would feel more connection to a child you've never met over the one you raised for 12 years because they're genetically more similar to you?

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TreyFlowers posted...

I... honestly don't know

I could never adopt a kid or have a kid that wasn't biologically mine. I know deep down a part of me would be thinking "you're not mine". So in this instance, I'm pretty sure my brain would break.

it sounds more like you would learn a life lesson. I don't think your brain would break I think you would learn you were wrong to assume you couldn't love an adopted kid

Biology is overrated.

Any person posting in this topic's dad might not be their real dad. Does that change how you think about him at all?
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That's the thing. I don't know how I'd react. It's easy for me to sit here and speculate. I'm just going by my "no adoption" rule.

Basically if for whatever reason my wife and I can't have kids naturally (as in, my sperm and her eggs), then I'm not having kids. No surrogate, no adoption, none of that. I'm okay with IVF because it's still our genetics. But nothing that isn't her and me.

Call it fucked up if you want, but that's me being honest with myself.

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Rypt posted...

I wonder how often that happens.

EDIT

Just saw post 3. I would just explain to the kid what happened. He can't be mad at me if it wasn't my fault.

I think your previous answer was fine, I just wanted the topic to mostly be about the child you raised and not how you would interact with your biological child.

TreyFlowers posted...

I'm just going by my "no adoption" rule.

I mean you can have whatever rule you want, it's your life. I just think you should consider whether you're "no adoption" rule is based on reasonable things if this scenario would make your mind break if it happened.

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if the child is still a baby, i'll look for the real one and put the other to adoption
if i raised it long enough, then probably not care enough as long as it's a secret

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No idea. I want to say I would continue to raise the kid I was raising as if he were my own. Being a parent doesn't mean you need to be related to the kid, if you've taken care of them their entire life and loved them then that is your child.

I'd also not pursue a relationship with my biological kid since that just makes things confusing. If the kid somehow found out and tried reaching out to me, that would change things, but I wouldn't destroy everything they knew just because of biology.

But still, that's easy to say hypothetically. It probably wouldn't be this easy if it were to actually happen.

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bump

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Huck him out the window and track down my real son.

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This is pretty much impossible in this day.

It's not like the 50s or whatever where dad smokes a cig in the waiting room and they rush baby to wherever they used to rush baby so mom doesn't see.

They do all the vaccinations in the delivery room and, at least at my hospital, baby stays with you pretty much the entire time you're in the hospital. Especially if you forego circumcision.

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This was already a series on ABC Family/Freeform.
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If it were still a baby I'd try and find my bio kid and sort things out.

But after years of raising that child? That is my kid. I'll try and reach out to the other family and be open and honest with one another and try and develop a relationship with them and "my" biological kid but Im not going to give up the one I have because our dna isnt a match. Not aft years of raising them anyways.

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How would this happen? The baby doesn't leave the parents at any point.

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Zikten posted...

I would try to get to know my bio kid but I'd probably feel more bonded with the one I raised

also this was a Lifetime movie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gILG6_VarY

There was also a tv show that was literally called switched at birth.

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Laserion posted...

This was already a series on ABC Family/Freeform.

Guys, you know this used to be a common story element right? It didn't start with any of the things being listed.

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I would in all likelihood grieve for the child I never knew, but would not love the changeling any less.


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Family is chosen, blood doesn't mean shit.

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Anteaterking posted...

Guys, you know this used to be a common story element right? It didn't start with any of the things being listed.

I remember a story of a poor couple and a rich couple, both giving birth to twins in a rainy night. Babies were switched.

Both pairs grow up as non-identical twins. The rich pair living in opulence and privilege, while the poor pair living with scarcity and crappiness.

There's a revolution, and at some point during the fighting, both pairs of "non-identical twins" face each other, swords in hand, and realize the truth.
Your brother that grew up with you does not belong by your side, but on the other side! Or perhaps it is you who is in the wrong side!

It was a movie, and I can't find the name.
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