Current Events > CYOA: Your name is Karen

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BC
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B
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A

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A

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The_Bitcoin posted...

also, A

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Gonna take a break

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BatmanWTtP posted...

Gonna take a break

you earned it, you artist!

C

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The_Bitcoin posted...

you earned it, you artist!

This, this is classic
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A

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A

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A

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A) Complain to Trump

You're in awe, the greatest man who ever lived is here to bail you out. He scolds everyone in the police department and calls you a true patriot. The police are yelling at Trump to put on a mask, but this brave son of a bitch won't give them the satisfaction.

Trump makes his way over to you and offers a hug, tremendous photo op, the best photo op, Obama wishes he had photo ops like this. You start crying like those little girls meeting their favorite celebs, but this is bigger than that, you're meeting the most powerful man on Earth.

"It was horrible President Trump, they beat me, they framed me for murder, they defended pedophiles and rapists, they're probably doing drugs!." you complain letting Trump know of your problems.
"I have no doubt these people do drugs. We are in Commiefornia after all, a state which if I may add has the largest debt in the nation and highest percentage of high school drop outs" the police look around at each other. Officer James shakes his head.
"Not one part of that was true." James says in disbelief. Trump looks at him and shakes his head.
"What a nasty comment. You come at me with nasty comments like that and have the audacity to call this patriot a prisoner. In fact, this patriot is the new Chief of police." the department erupts into confusion

What do you do
A) you're the manager now, time to Make California Great Again
B) Try to seduce Trump


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B!

B
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B

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A
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B
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B then A

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FabIemaster posted...

B then A

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FabIemaster posted...

B then A

B) Try to seduce Trump
A) you're the manager now, time to Make California Great Again

"Me? Chief of Police?" you're in disbelief but ecstatic. You aren't quite sure what do, you're so overcome with emotions and horniness that your body starts moving on its own. You look Trump in the eyes and bite your bottom lip. You start rubbing you hands through Trump's hair, there's not much and you immediately try to move it back into place so that you don't lose horny levels.
"Karen, are you trying to seduce me?" The President asks.
"It does appear that way." you whisper into his ear and sexual like.
"But, I'm married, what about Mary, or Adriana, or whatever her name is." he says as he's already grabbing your wine box.
"I don't really care, do you?" you say before knocking all the equipment off a nearby desk and mounting the President. You go to take down the President's pants but he pushes you off and rebuckles his pants. You look to him in confusion.
"I'm done." he says with a smug look on his face. "I hope it was as good for you as it was for me." he adds puzzling you.
"But we didn't... I didn't even get to..."
"What are you talking about?" he asks
"Donny, I'm still, ya know... I haven't been satisfied." you point to your dry crotch.
"I'm not seeing what that has to do with anything." he hands you 100,000 dollars,, "I don't know what's wrong but that should take care of it. Tweet me if you ever want to do this again." he leaves.

It's been three years since that day. Your life has changed quite a bit, and by quite a bit I mean you were the mayor of California. As the new Chief your first act was to fire the department, they were all angry, people complained in Twitter, but luckily some freedom toting protestors arrived to even the score, you hired them as your new police crew. With the cops under your belt you dismissed all charges against yourself.

With the money left to you by Trump you successfully started and ran a campaign for state governor. It was a close race but you gained the voters trust by fighting to reopen the state. As in literally fighting. As in you stormed the capital with guns and Trump called you a patriot and pardoned you. There were thousands of unforseen deaths after the state repopened, partially due to your freedom fighters, but mostly due to 5G. You and your supporters quickly set out in destroying all 5G towers in California. There were unrelated fires and God knows how much destruction, but 5G is no longer a threat in California, 5G sickness however is still around. They've begun referring to it as 5Die,it's not clever or witty, but it's easier for your followers to understand than 5G.

You miss your family. You haven't seen your daughter since that first day. Your now ex-husband found out about Julio and left, which was for the best as you found yourself a new man, the re-elected Trump. With your help California turned red, both in voters and in the fires. Red California called the election for Trump. It was a landslide, both the election and the countless areas of destruction left by you ignoring public safety codes. After helping him get re-elected, the manager of immigration got an anonymous tip about Meliana and she found herself on plane back to not America. She took her son with her leaving you and Trump to paint the white house white(That's a semen joke)

You wake up, it's a beautiful day in the White House.

What do you do?
A) Go get some First Lady wine
B) Go check in on Susan, the Governor of California
C) Go to Donald and try to get pregnant

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amazing

AC
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AC
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Bump before I go to sleep

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AC

This is the most unconstitutional CYOA Ive ever read.

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BatmanWTtP posted...

the re-elected Trump.

Nooooooooooo
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AC

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This is amazing! The last one is getting too real, though.

AB

BatmanWTtP posted...

We are in Commiefornia after all, a state which if I may add has the largest debt in the nation and highest percentage of high school drop outs" the police look around at each other. Officer James shakes his head.
"Not one part of that was true." James says in disbelief.

I could totally see this happening IRL, besides calling it Commiefornia.
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AC

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Update later, I've been playing Persona 5 and didn't realize how late it's gotten >_>

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I feel bad for people that are actually named Karen now. Fucking internet.

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Lets be real aint nobody was named Karen until this meme took off.

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OffTempo posted...

Lets be real aint nobody was named Karen until this meme took off.

Weve only just begun to have Karens.

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A) Go get some First Lady wine
C) Go to Donald and try to get pregnant

Life is amazing. You walk down the halls of the White House(White Halls?) and towards the White Kitchen.Once inside you're greeted by the beautiful voices of the White staff. All the beautiful buff men, the servants, it's like a Disney movie, you can almost hear them singing a song for you. Or maybe that's the Presidential wine speaking. This bottle belonged to JFK, but he's got no use for it. In your drunken ecstasy you begin thinking of your dear old daughter, Judith and Trump's former children; Baron, Ivanka, and the other one. Donald probably gets lonely knowing you basically eliminated his legacy and truth be told, you miss your daughter. So like all good mothers, it's time to replace her.

You knock on your hubby's door. His body guards tell you to wait as he is addressing the Nation, but you know nobody actually watches him so this is the best time to talk to him. You ignore their warnings and enter the Oval Office. Donald looks to you in confusion.
"I'm in the middle of something Karen." he says before looking into his teleprompter.
"The only thing you're going to be in is me." you say seductively. He fails to understand. There's an awkward silence. "We're going to make Monica Lewinsky look like a girl scout. Trump looks to you in confusion.
"Who?"
"The chick that blew Bill Clinton in this very room."
"That didn't happen, he said it didn't."

A few confusing and awkward seconds later you find yourself leaving the oval office unsatisfied. You can't help but think you're doing something wrong. You know your body is banging, but no man should be finishing that fast. There's got to be something you can do about this.

What do you do?
A) Go to the store and buy some erectile dysfunction pills
B) Go ask Mike Pence for advice
C) Ask Ivanka for advice, sure you kicked her out of the family, but it can't hurt to ask


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OK so I just popped in and skipped to where we currently are and
what the fuck

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C
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B
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teepan95 posted...

B

C but you end up hooking up with Ivanka instead

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B

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A

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B
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Bump

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B

Bc

Caroniver posted...

OK so I just popped in and skipped to where we currently are and
what the fuck

This part of the story takes place in 2023, 3 years after Trump was reelected and California defeated its 5G problems. Karen married Trump after getting his wife deported.
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Update tomorrow, I have an idea and I'm just trying to figure out how to get there

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