Poll of the Day > So, being at my dad's place is going exactly as expected...

(+) Yeah! (+)

I got here at 7:30 this morning because I worked last night. I have to be back in at 3pm, so I just went straight to bed.

At 10:30am I'm woken up by him telling and cussing at my mom. He's accusing us of taking over(we literally only slept here) and I hear him tell her that he thinks I'm a useless piece of shit because I'm not outside helping him with whatever he was doing. I mean, I'm literally the only one of us here with a job, and my schedule sucks sometimes. He knew this, and used it as an excuse to start trouble literally only 3 hours after I got here.

Mom got upset because for some reason she didn't expect this. She left and took my cousin to his grandma's house. While she was gone he was in the room next to mine slamming things around and cussing to himself just trying to keep me awake. After about an hour he left to his place and I got a bit of a nap.

Mom got home a while ago and now he's just in the living room standing over her and occasionally throwing out a random insult towards one of us to see if she reacts.

God I feel so sick right now. Was so tired I was seeing double(haven't slept well for like 3 days). I'm stressed and frustrated and tired and I don't know what to do.

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Have you tried kicking his ass it sounds like he deserves it

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Mead posted...

Have you tried kicking his ass it sounds like he deserves it

Alright, sounds like mom is finally willing to file for divorce.

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Sounds like you should just leave. No sense staying there if he doesn't want you, and I think he needs to hear that.

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adjl posted...

Sounds like you should just leave. No sense staying there if he doesn't want you, and I think he needs to hear that.

I guess we are. She talked to the owner of the house we just moved from and they'll let us stay there for a while longer until we find another place.

Mom has finally called him on all his bullshit over the years and I backed her up with loads of other times she didn't mention. This man should've been in prison a long time ago, and I wish we had the balls back then to have sent him.

Now he's asking us to stay here and acting like he doesn't understand why we're leaving.

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Oh, I thought you were visiting for the holidays or something. If it's a matter of staying there as part of a move, then that's different. Still, good to get out of that.

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Still not going well, I see... Thats really sucks. I know youre in a tough spot, though...
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I'm sorry, family shouldn't be like that.

adjl posted...

Oh, I thought you were visiting for the holidays or something. If it's a matter of staying there as part of a move, then that's different. Still, good to get out of that.

Yeah, we were supposed to move back home for good. The lady that we were keeping her house for asked us to leave. Today was supposed to be our first day back, but I guess half a day was too much for everyone.

I'm glad she opened her eyes and saw how irredeemable he is, but God I'm so sick of this. It's just pure misery again.

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Ugh, so I just pulled up to work. I look like garbage, didn't have a chance to shower and mom took all of my clothes back to her car. I feel so grungy and gross, and I didn't bring any food or drinks with me. Today is shaping up just lovely.

Although, I did give him a taste of his own medicine and cussed him like a dog before I left. He tried telling me I was being unreasonable and just doing it to be mean, so I told him I got it from him, cussed him even harder and told him that's how he treats us constantly and that we're not putting up with it any longer.

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I thought you and your family worked together as a family of truck stop janitors. What happened to that?

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KogaSteelfang posted...

I guess we are. She talked to the owner of the house we just moved from and they'll let us stay there for a while longer until we find another place.

This is progress. Wasn't you actually living next door to your parents though? I guess I missed something.
Still moving out away from toxic people is the best. Not only for your family but more importantly for you. You really need as less shit as possible based on what you type here. Eventually getting your own place or moving in with someone would be the best idea but you've explained how that's not a option right now.

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Jackal4 posted...

I thought you and your family worked together as a family of truck stop janitors. What happened to that?

That came to an end. Dad had an aneurism a couple of years ago and very nearly died. He retired after that. Mom quit that job a few months later after being harrassed and mistreated for taking time off to get my dad his check ups. I didn't last long after that as they just started harrassing me once she was gone. Now I work front desk at a hotel.

wwinterj25 posted...

This is progress. Wasn't you actually living next door to your parents though? I guess I missed something.
Still moving out away from toxic people is the best. Not only for your family but more importantly for you. You really need as less shit as possible based on what you type here. Eventually getting your own place or moving in with someone would be the best idea but you've explained how that's not a option right now.

Yeah, my place is next to his. Mom stayed at my place with my cousin last night so he wouldn't be there alone while I was at work. Dad came into my place to start trouble with everyone. It just reached a breaking point since he couldn't even last half a day without going back to this crap. Neither me, or my mom could handle it today so we're leaving. Hopefully forever.

Edit: I'm just so mentally exhausted right now. It looks like it's going to be a slow night at work thankfully.

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KogaSteelfang posted...

I mean, I'm literally the only one of us here with a job,

Then go get your own place, or ask to stay in an unoccupied room. Cut your ties with all of them already.


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It's not hard to see why he had an aneurysm.

Sorry edit: I'm not blaming tc. I meant because of his anger

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Zeus posted...

Then go get your own place, or ask to stay in an unoccupied room. Cut your ties with all of them already.

It's just his dad that's bad. Not his mom or cousin. And he likes them. And she probably would let Koga get away that easily...
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Zeus posted...

Then go get your own place, or ask to stay in an unoccupied room. Cut your ties with all of them already.

Koga has explained this multiple times.

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So I'm back at the other place now. Gonna shower then sleep. Talked with my mom about our options, and it looks like we might be moving to the next town to stay with my aunt for a while.

Good news about that is that she lives like 5 minutes from work. So it'd be handy to be that close.

Anyway, good night. And thanks for listening. I really needed to let that out of my system.

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You're the only one with a job.
Get a roommate who also has a job and get the fuck out of that house
Fuck the bullshit excuses you normally give and just leave.

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KogaSteelfang posted...

Good news about that is that she lives like 5 minutes from work. So it'd be handy to be that close.

That's certainly helpful and is great while you and your family sort a alternative living situation. I take it you get on well with your Aunt?

KogaSteelfang posted...

Anyway, good night. And thanks for listening. I really needed to let that out of my system.

No problem man. I hope things work out for you and your family.

SusanGreenEyes posted...

You're the only one with a job.
Get a roommate who also has a job and get the fuck out of that house
Fuck the bullshit excuses you normally give and just leave.

Saying this multiple times doesn't magically change Kogas situation. I'm sure if possible he would have done one of these things already. Living at home tends to be cheaper too.

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EvilMegas posted...

It's not hard to see why he had an aneurysm.

Sorry edit: I'm not blaming tc. I meant because of his anger

You have no idea. The amount of hate he seems to have for us is ridiculous. Then he tries to get us to come back by taking kindness. He was texting mom all night asking her to come back and saying he didn't know why we left.

Also, I'm more pissed off at him now. I didn't get to see my cousin yesterday, as he was asleep when u got home, they left while I was in bed, then he was asleep when I got back from work last night too. I asked my mom how he was handling it, and she said not well. Said he was crying and asking why my dad has to be so mean all the time. Dad thinks it's funny to do this to us. I honestly think he's evil.

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KogaSteelfang posted...

You have no idea. The amount of hate he seems to have for us is ridiculous. Then he tries to get us to come back by taking kindness. He was texting mom all night asking her to come back and saying he didn't know why we left.

Also, I'm more pissed off at him now. I didn't get to see my cousin yesterday, as he was asleep when u got home, they left while I was in bed, then he was asleep when I got back from work last night too. I asked my mom how he was handling it, and she said not well. Said he was crying and asking why my dad has to be so mean all the time. Dad thinks it's funny to do this to us. I honestly think he's evil.

How old is your cousin?
Does your cousin live with you?

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SusanGreenEyes posted...

How old is your cousin?
Does your cousin live with you?

19, mentally handicapped, and yeah he does.

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Not much to update on. He's been texting my mom all night and all day asking for us to come back. That we're being ridiculous for leaving and that we're the ones who were causing the problems. Turns out that him cussing them and everything was literally the first time they'd even seen each other that day. They moved in Friday night and went to bed, then as soon as they stepped outside Saturday morning he went off on them because they were bringing our stuff in from the car.

I told her that if she's serious about leaving him that she needs to block his number and forget about him.

She went back this morning to pick up some of our stuff we left behind and he doesn't think he did anything wrong. Like seriously, he believes we started it all and he's innocent. Apparently some of the things I said to him before I left bothered him though. I'm not sure how to feel about that, kinda feel bad that I hurt him, but he deserved it... so idk.

So yeah, I imagine everything is mostly done at this point. Just gotta find another place, move, and hopefully that'll be the end of it.

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KogaSteelfang posted...

I honestly think he's evil.

From what you told me, I'd agree...

KogaSteelfang posted...

I'm not sure how to feel about that, kinda feel bad that I hurt him, but he deserved it... so idk.

That's probably because you're a nice person. I sometimes feel bad for saying certain thing to people, even when that person is mean, deserves it, etc...
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KogaSteelfang posted...

So yeah, I imagine everything is mostly done at this point. Just gotta find another place, move, and hopefully that'll be the end of it.

The important thing is you and your family don't go back. Honestly some folk don't know how lucky they are to have kids and someone to love in their life and your dad should realise that. Something tells me he never will though.


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wwinterj25 posted...

The important thing is you and your family don't go back. Honestly some folk don't know how lucky they are to have kids and someone to love in their life and your dad should realise that. Something tells me he never will though.

He won't. So far my mom is determined to not go back, but he's already got her feeling bad about leaving again. We've all collectively decided that we can't handle this any more, so I'm pushing for her to cut contact.

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People like that suck. Got a brother who acts pretty similar, only with the occasional physical violence when we don't worship him, and plenty of drug use, which involves borrowing money from people who have no problem threatening us when they can't find him since he runs off to hide from debt. I honestly hope he pisses off the the wrong person someday and gets himself killed, hopefully without it effecting us beyond having to deal with his death.

Best of luck getting him out of your life.
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DeltaBladeX posted...

People like that suck. Got a brother who acts pretty similar, only with the occasional physical violence when we don't worship him, and plenty of drug use, which involves borrowing money from people who have no problem threatening us when they can't find him since he runs off to hide from debt. I honestly hope he pisses off the the wrong person someday and gets himself killed, hopefully without it effecting us beyond having to deal with his death.

Best of luck getting him out of your life.

That's terrible. My dad used to be very physically violent, but it never involved drugs or alcohol, or putting us in danger from other people.

I hate to hear that you feel that way about him. I want to say that hope he can straighten up and you can reconsile with him, but I know that's not always possible. So I wish you the best regardless, and hope things work out for both of your interests.

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We won't reconcile. He doesn't give a damn about anyone other than himself in the first place. Everyone else only matters in how they can be used to get what he wants and hang the consequences because he never intends to stick around for them. I gave up on him years ago, and were I not living with mum (who keeps giving him chances), I'd call the police every time I'd see him.

I'm just happy he is gone for now. After 'borrowing' the Christmas money mum saved this year and figuring out there was nothing left he could get out of her, he finally went back to the fishing boats he works on when he bothers (for only the second time this year), we likely won't see him until after New Years.
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I'm sorry to hear that. In a perfect world family would be the ones you can count on, not the ones treating you like a disposable resource. :/

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Hey, mom got a job today and found out that she qualifies for Medicaid. Things are starting to look up a bit.

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Good to hear man.

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Mead posted...

Have you tried kicking his ass it sounds like he deserves it

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KogaSteelfang posted...

Hey, mom got a job today and found out that she qualifies for Medicaid. Things are starting to look up a bit.

Exciting.
Congratulations!

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