Current Events > Can someone explain to me the appeal of being in a relationship?

(+) Yeah! (+)

Pretend like you're explaining it to a sociopath

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I just dont understand

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This says and explains a lot about you and your issues.
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its a lifestyle. pretty simple idea, maybe you just dont want to understand.
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Prof in soc102 said relationships are a status shield
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Imagine having a girl who actually cares about you instead of some weird hoe who just wants a hookup, and then wants to sleep with another guy after, and another guy after that.
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Feeling cared for and companionship and having someone who'll love and take care of you.... or something.
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No_U_L7 posted...

Pretend like you're explaining it to a sociopath

BuckVanHammer posted...

its a lifestyle. pretty simple idea, maybe you just dont want to understand.

But why is it the default lifestyle

Pepys Monster posted...

Imagine having a girl who actually cares about you instead of some weird hoe who just wants a hookup, and then wants to sleep with another guy after, and another guy after that.

Why does it matter if anyone cares about you? Gonna ignore the 2nd part.

evil_zombie11 posted...

Feeling cared for and companionship and having someone who'll love and take care of you.... or something.

That doesnt work because you started the sentence with the word feeling.


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You're not a sociopath. You're just an asshole.
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DK9292 posted...

You're not a sociopath. You're just an asshole.

Where did I say I was a sociopath

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This is probably one of the TCs saddest moments on this board.
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The intimacy and being cared for and being close to each other. Being able to talk to each other about everything. Companionship in general, etc

Hooking up is literally what's pointless to me. I don't find sex rewarding without the closeness. It's more work than it's worth to seek

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For me it's having someone I can share everything about myself with and in turn receive the same in return. It's nice to have someone who won't harshly judge you that you can just be yourself around.

Getting to know a person without any of the normal falseness that people use to get by day to day is a vastly rewarding experience.

I've been with my partner for like 10 years now and it's been a great experience. Who wouldn't want to have the person they always want to hang out with most just always around.

You get to be with someone who's okay with you having your mouth all over them.
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Ultimately it depends on you and what you want in life. I'm not a very social person with very few mainstream hobbies and generally prefer to be left alone to my own devices(video games). And when I'm lonely I just visit my family every now and then.

I've never needed alcohol, medication, cigarettes or drugs fend off boredom, depression or just to have fun.

Not trying to drown relationships or anything but while it can work often many other times it can literally be the source of all your drama problems in life. And in regards to the former I dont want to deal with any of that. And I'd rather use that time for more productive things like my career.

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Amazon_Shampoo posted...

Who wouldn't want to have the person they always want to hang out with most just always around.

Me, that sounds atrocious. Even my best friends I only want to see a couple times a month. My family I only see once a month

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No_U_L7 posted...

Amazon_Shampoo posted...

Who wouldn't want to have the person they always want to hang out with most just always around.

Me, that sounds atrocious. Even my best friends I only want to see a couple times a month. My family I only see once a month

This is called being anti social, it is not a good thing but it explains a lot about you TC.
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Depends if she's a good house mate or not. If she's a good house mate, you got someone to cook meals on off days and maybe help clean up.

I don't understand why people prefer bad relationships over being single tho. Aside from them hating their own company more than hating someone elses that they don't have good chemistry with

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Nah. Why explain? You wouldn't understand. Just chalk it up to people being different and wanting different things than you.
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RiKuToTheMiGhtY posted...

This is called being anti social, it is not a good thing but it explains a lot about you TC.

I've flat out said that before...I'm extremely misanthropic

Lost_All_Senses posted...

Depends if she's a good house mate or not. If she's a good house mate, you got someone to cook meals on off days and maybe help clean up.

I don't understand why people prefer bad relationships over being single tho. Aside from them hating their own company more than hating someone elses that they don't have good chemistry with

I feel like its misogynistic to prefer a girl that cooks and cleans, which means if she doesn't I'm stuck paying the bill for a cleaning lady/eating out.

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No_U_L7 posted...

DK9292 posted...

You're not a sociopath. You're just an asshole.

Where did I say I was a sociopath

No_U_L7 posted...

Pretend like you're explaining it to a sociopath

So... you can pretend like you're "asking for a friend," but in wording it the way you did, you don't get to ride the high horse and be like "actually, I never said that."

On topic, it's about intimacy. This is something that goes above and beyond sex. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're not a gimmick. Nothing is better than cuddling up with someone you care about on the couch after a rough day and both of you expect nothing. You're just there for each other, enjoying each other's company, and willing to bear your soul to the other one at the drop of a hat if it is what is required.

Sure, you can find that sort of intimacy with a roommate, but judging how you treat others, based on your topics, you're a long way off from ever reaching that with anyone.
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Laserion posted...

Nah. Why explain? You wouldn't understand. Just chalk it up to people being different and wanting different things than you.

Because I'm trying to understand perspective

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Lol, it's funny how people are taking that sociopath thing so serious. They have such a low opinion of you dude lol

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Eat More Beef posted...

So... you can pretend like you're "asking for a friend," but in wording it the way you did, you don't get to ride the high horse and be like "actually, I never said that."

On topic, it's about intimacy. This is something that goes above and beyond sex. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're not a gimmick. Nothing is better than cuddling up with someone yiu care about on the couch after a rough day and both of you expect nothing. You're just there for each other, enjoying each other's company and willing to bear your soul to the other one at the drop of a hat if it is what is required.

Sure, you can find that sort of intimacy with a roommate, but judging how you treat others, based on your topics, you're a long way off from ever reaching that with anyone.

You realize the first word in that sentence you bolded is PRETEND right? IE, that is me explicitly saying I'm not a sociopath otherwise I wouldve left that word out

And I dont have a soul, so I guess theres nothing to bare...

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A simple "good morning" from da GF makes da day a 10/10 tbh
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No_U_L7 posted...

Eat More Beef posted...

So... you can pretend like you're "asking for a friend," but in wording it the way you did, you don't get to ride the high horse and be like "actually, I never said that."

On topic, it's about intimacy. This is something that goes above and beyond sex. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're not a gimmick. Nothing is better than cuddling up with someone yiu care about on the couch after a rough day and both of you expect nothing. You're just there for each other, enjoying each other's company and willing to bear your soul to the other one at the drop of a hat if it is what is required.

Sure, you can find that sort of intimacy with a roommate, but judging how you treat others, based on your topics, you're a long way off from ever reaching that with anyone.

You realize the first word in that sentence you bolded is PRETEND right? IE, that is me explicitly saying I'm not a sociopath otherwise I wouldve left that word out

And I dont have a soul, so I guess theres nothing to bare...

Clearly no one has a soul, but it's an expression. It's a way to get things off your chest.

And no, I didn't negate your wording. I answered why in my post. You should re-read my first bit and maybe you'll understand.
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V-E-G-Y- posted...

A simple "good morning" from da GF makes da day a 10/10 tbh

I'm not dependent on other people for my happiness. I could not talk to anyone and still have a 10/10 day

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Eat More Beef posted...

Clearly no one has a soul, but it's an expression. It's a way to get things off your chest.

And no, I didn't negate your wording. I answered why in my post. You should re-read my first bit and maybe you'll understand.

Then you are the one that misunderstood. I simply wanted the explanation phrased in a more logical than emotional way. Ie I dont want people to say "because of love" which is an abstract concept that doesnt mean anything

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To a sociopath?

The obvious gratification of sex, then.

If you want a long term girlfriend/relationship it is best to get a woman who does cook, clean, has traditional values. The modern feminist is useless, and just dead weight with an attitude that will eventually set you up on false accusations when you piss her off.

Its not misogynistic to want a woman who has value, and her value is low as shit if she cant cook or clean.
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Kensaimage posted...

To a sociopath?

The obvious gratification of sex, then.

Dont need to be in a relationship to have sex

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RiKuToTheMiGhtY posted...

If you want a long term girlfriend/relationship it is best to get a woman who does cook, clean, has traditional values. The modern feminist is useless, and just dead weight with an attitude that will eventually set you up on false accusations when you piss her off.

Its not misogynistic to want a woman who has value, and her value is low as shit if she cant cook or clean.

I dont believe in such traditional gender roles and believe that is misogynistic to place girls in those gender roles just because they are girls

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Then you do better to stay single, the modern feminist is not worth the drama and other bullshit they come with.

I would rather be single then date any woman that is a modern feminist.
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RiKuToTheMiGhtY posted...

Then you do better to stay single, the modern feminist is not worth the drama and other bullshit they come with.

I would rather be single then date any woman that is a feminist.

You can replace "modern feminist" with people and I still think your statement would be accurate

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No_U_L7 posted...

Eat More Beef posted...

Clearly no one has a soul, but it's an expression. It's a way to get things off your chest.

And no, I didn't negate your wording. I answered why in my post. You should re-read my first bit and maybe you'll understand.

Then you are the one that misunderstood. I simply wanted the explanation phrased in a more logical than emotional way. Ie I dont want people to say "because of love" which is an abstract concept that doesnt mean anything

Which I did in the last part of my post. Either you're being obtuse on purpose or trying to get my goat. Seeing as how he's banned, let me break it down further.

Not everyone determines their self worth by how much they make/how many chicks they've slept with. Some of us find joy in other avenues of life.

You're asking a question you clearly don't want a response to because instead of addressing the bigger point I made, you've decided to argue semantics.

Trust me, homie, my life has been incredibly fulfilling, because it's about experiences across a broad spectrum of aspects, opposed to the one or two things you have (and once again, I can only go off what you post about, so fogrive me if there are other factors I don't know about).
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Having a girlfriend that actually likes being feminine is something you should atleast experience once before you knock it.

I also never said as a man you should not cook and clean either, tonight I plan on putting together a pasta for dinner as she cooked yesterday.

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Eat More Beef posted...

Not everyone determines their self worth by how much they make/how many chicks they've slept with. Some of us find joy in other avenues of life.

I think determining self worth based off other people is even worse. You're literally depending on others to make yourself feel good instead of doing it yourself

And no, those things are not how I determine my self worth

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RiKuToTheMiGhtY posted...

Having a girlfriend that actually likes being feminine is something you should atleast experience once before you knock it.

I also never said as a man you should not cook and clean either, tonight I plan on putting together a pasta for dinner as she cooked yesterday.

The way you define "being feminine" is extremely misogynistic

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Knowing that theres someone youre not related to who cares about you and who you also care about deeply is a great feeling. It's a lot more intimate than a friendship
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Feline_Heart posted...

Knowing that theres someone youre not related to who cares about you and who you also care about deeply is a great feeling. It's a lot more intimate than a friendship

Explain that without using the word feeling and intimate

And again I dont base my self worth off who does/doesnt care about me. I dont depend on anyone else for my own happiness besides me

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No_U_L7 posted...

Feline_Heart posted...

Knowing that theres someone youre not related to who cares about you and who you also care about deeply is a great feeling. It's a lot more intimate than a friendship

Explain that without using the word feeling and intimate

And again I dont base my self worth off who does/doesnt care about me. I dont depend on anyone else for my own happiness besides me

I didnt say anything about self worth and I didnt say that you cant be happy unless you depend on someone else. Being in a relationship just exposes you to new things and allows to build an extremely close bond with another person. Your posts are kind of creeping me out by the way
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Feline_Heart posted...

I didnt say anything about self worth and I didnt say that you cant be happy unless you depend on someone else. Being in a relationship just exposes you to new things and allows to build an extremely close bond with another person. Your posts are kind of creeping me out by the way

New things like what? What use is an extremely close bond?

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No_U_L7 posted...

Eat More Beef posted...

Not everyone determines their self worth by how much they make/how many chicks they've slept with. Some of us find joy in other avenues of life.

I think determining self worth based off other people is even worse. You're literally depending on others to make yourself feel good instead of doing it yourself

And no, those things are not how I determine my self worth

And once again you're ignoring portions of my post to cherry pick. You're also assuming I base my self-worth on a partner.

So, I'll ask one thing. What have you done in life that you consider an accomplishment? And I bet that you're life is wayyyyyy more one dimensional and shallow than mine (weird flex, I know, but I gotta).
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Eat More Beef posted...

And once again you're ignoring portions of my post to cherry pick. You're also assuming I base my self-worth on a partner.

So, I'll ask one thing. What have you done in life that you consider an accomplishment? And I bet that you're life is wayyyyyy more one dimensional and shallow than mine (weird flex, I know, but I gotta).

On a more basic level I'm the most clever, fastest thinking and funniest person I've ever encountered. In terms of non abstract accomplishments I literally save the world every day at work. I have multiple degrees and certifications in engineering. I understand attraction at the highest level. And I lived long enough to finish both the MCU and GoT.

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No_U_L7 posted...

Eat More Beef posted...

And once again you're ignoring portions of my post to cherry pick. You're also assuming I base my self-worth on a partner.

So, I'll ask one thing. What have you done in life that you consider an accomplishment? And I bet that you're life is wayyyyyy more one dimensional and shallow than mine (weird flex, I know, but I gotta).

On a more basic level I'm the most clever, fastest thinking and funniest person I've ever encountered. In terms of non abstract accomplishments I literally save the world every day at work. I have multiple degrees and certifications in engineering. I understand attraction at the highest level. And I lived long enough to finish both the MCU and GoT.

The bolded bit is subjective.
For the italic bit, I'm a janitor in a hospital, so my job is to kill crazy bacteria/disease, so I guess that one's a push.
Also, saying you save lives every day as an engineer is rather hyperbole. I know quite a few engineers (they work for Faro, Amazon, Pivotal Payments, The Military), and none of them would ever make that claim.

Anyway, I'm outtie. You clearly think too highly of yourself while just being an average person (there's nothing wrong with being average, but with pimping yourself out that hard, you fall short homie).
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Eat More Beef posted...

The bolded bit is subjective.
For the italic bit, I'm a janitor in a hospital, so my job is to kill crazy bacteria/disease, so I guess that one's a push.
Also, saying you save lives every day as an engineer is rather hyperbole. I know quite a few engineers (they work for Faro, Amazon, Pivotal Payments, The Military), and none of them would ever make that claim.

Anyway, I'm outtie. You clearly think too highly of yourself while just being an average person (there's nothing wrong with being average, but with pimping yourself out that hard, you fall short homie).

1. Its not a competition, everyone is just trying their best to excel at their lives
2. I clearly acknowledged it was subjective hence why I provided more concrete examples
3. I'm not that type of engineer. Without getting into too much details for personal reasons, I work in emergency planning and response for the government
4. My confidence is hard earned through perseverance despite a lifetime of pain
5. There is nothing about me that is just average

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Prismsblade posted...

I've never needed alcohol, medication, cigarettes or drugs fend off boredom, depression or just to have fun.

sex?

For one, you don't feel the need to lie on the internet about yourself.

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