LogFAQs > #914625139

Which is his right. He can do whatever he wants. I never felt entitled to a relationship with him, and if anything a good chunk of my pain is from when he made it out publically like we were actually dating (even if he didn't say it outright), then moved onto other people without being clear with me. However, in hindsight, I will say that I should've made the second choice out of the game and gotten out of the way.

I don't think anyone feels entitled about him. I think he very aggressively flirts, and people catch feels, but he never outright denies them because he liked the affection he was getting from other people. Personally, I never actually cared if we were actually dating or not, moreso than I did being betrayed by someone close to me. He doesn't know how to say no or stand his ground when it comes to this kind of stuff. He just lets it happen. I have a theory it's so that he can always remain a victim. He's never wrong, after all.

Over the last 2 months, my emotional health has waned in large part due to green butter. Whenever I would talk to him, I'd get one word answers and deflections. Disinterest, basically. Unless he wanted to vent about some drama issue he's having with whomever. Whenever I would try to communicate how he's affecting me, he would give me short answers, never acknowledge anything I'd say. It's like watching your closest friend willing go onto a downward spiral, and allowing themselves to be manipulated. You see, I thought we were close, given all that we'd shared and been through together this whole time from January until June. It was a long six months and I took our friendship seriously. Sometimes he'd apologize because he thought it'd keep me around/the "drama" would go away, but he didn't actually feel sorry for his actions. He'd turn right around and go back on what he said immediately after without a second thought. Even accusing me of jealousy/being buttmad because he's giving attention to other people, but honestly I just cared about him and knew he was fucking up his life. He always said he knows whats he's doing, and I believe it. He wants whatever bad shit happens in his life. He's using unhealthy relationships with people as a substitute for getting professional help and therapy. Because he "wants to be happy". Even if it's a facade. He's told me before that he thinks he might have BPD or Bipolar (which is a big reason I supported him going to therapy), and while I don't know if he has those, I believe he has something.

As I mentioned previously, I cut him out of my life. Whenever he's around or comes up, I'm literally in physical pain. Like I said, he became my trauma. I talked to him almost daily for six months, most of the time about deeply personal shit. Plus with the history I've described, feelings and emotional investment were extremely muddled. Particularly on my end. He would never give me a straight answer on what I was to him. First I blocked him on everything but Facebook Messenger and told him why I was doing this. I wanted him to be able to contact me if he really needed someone to confide in (as he has been doing), because I didn't want to abandon him knowing his issues. Then I told his that I couldn't just sit there and watch him be online on Messenger and explained that I'm blocking him there too. After one of my friends called him out on causing people emotional pain among other things, he texted me telling me that it wasn't cool and that he knew it was me that talked to him. I explained I needed a support system. Outside of recently noting his toxic behavior, I've never talked shit about him, I've never given out personal information, and I've never painted him in a bad light. I always defended him where necessary if I was asking for feedback about certain situations from people that I knew and trusted.
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