Push a button! Wait, read the post first, THEN push a button! - Results (6 votes)
Blue! Gimme my waifu!
50% (3 votes)
3
Purple! Isekai me, sky daddy!
16.67% (1 vote)
1
Orange! I like my life just fine!
16.67% (1 vote)
1
butirefuse.jpg
16.67% (1 vote)
1
Oh no! You were casually browsing CE and opened a seemingly innocuous topic to find that the first post was a .gif of a truck in the distance moving slowly toward you! The shock caused you to have a heart attack and die!
Suddenly, you wake up in a generic paradise, sitting on green grass. A few feet in front of you sits unambiguously god, but he insists you call him Frank. As it turns out, hornyposting on CE plays a critical role in keeping multiversal horny levels in check, preventing disastrous horny overload. So to reward you for your tireless efforts, Frank presents you with three buttons and allows you to press one.
If you press the blue button:You'll be instantly transported to any existing fictional universe of your choice. In addition, you can choose one character from that universe who will be aware of you and receptive to any type of relationship you might want with them. You'll still have to put in the appropriate effort, but as long as you're sincere, they won't turn you away.
If you press the purple button:You'll be instantly transported to a broad category of universe of your choice (such as fantasy RPG or sci-fi adventure). You'll also instantly acquire incredible talent in a skill or profession of your choice. You'll still need to learn and master the skills yourself, but you'll find it incredibly easy to do so.
If you press the orange button:You'll be instantly transported to a parallel version of our universe, to any point in time of your choosing
except the future. The only differences between this universe and our own are relatively minor ones, like the Coca-Cola logo being blue instead of red, or Nicolas Cage playing Aragorn in the Lord of the Rings movies. You'll also acquire one fairly specific superpower of your choice. (So you couldn't, say, gain the powers of Superman, but you could, for example, gain super strength or the ability to fly.)
No matter which button you press, you'll also gain the ability to change any or even every aspect of your form: appearance, voice, anatomy, anything goes, as long as it's appropriate for the universe you choose. You can only do this once before entering the new universe.
In addition, you'll gain a special phone that only you can see and interact with. This phone will never take damage or break down, it has infinite battery and storage, it will update to a newer version with more power and features whenever you want, and you can summon it to you at will. With it, you have unrestricted access to our universe's internet, which updates with the passage of time in your new universe. (So, for example, after a year in your new life, the internet you see will be the internet of May 2025.) People you talk to will fully trust that you've found a way to communicate from beyond the grave, but they'll dismiss anything you tell them about your new life as a silly story.
If you choose not to press any of the buttons, you begin your afterlife in generic paradise. It's...fine. The scenery is lovely and the weather is always perfect, but there isn't anything to
do. You also don't get the special phone, but you can change your form at will. However, everyone recognizes everyone else by their souls, so you can't use this to trick people. Also, you can talk to Frank whenever you want. He has some kinda weird hobbies, but he's mostly pretty chill. Just don't ask him about why he didn't stop various atrocities throughout history, he'll get really defensive about being in the bathroom at the time.
wat do
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