WHO WOULD WIN IN A FIGHT: Venezuelan Warship vs. Cruise Ship to see penguins

Board 8

Board 8 » WHO WOULD WIN IN A FIGHT: Venezuelan Warship vs. Cruise Ship to see penguins
Wanglicious
04/03/2020
04:18 PM
#1
i present you the most April Fools story that wasn't an April Fools joke this year.

conditions:
  • international waters
  • warship has guns, cruise ship doesn't
  • warship sneak attacks at night
  • cruise ship is an arctic ship made in Germany
  • no nearby penguins


this actually happened on March 30th.
first place that had this story was this one, i think. it's in Spanish:
https://www.infodefensa.com/latam/2020/03/31/noticia-naiguata-hunde-colisionar-contra-buque-pasajeros-resolute.html

an English one can be found here, with some early statements by Venezuela (important because they've already changed some details):
https://www.maritime-executive.com/article/venezuelan-navy-patrol-boat-sinks-after-collision-with-cruise-ship

and finally, this is the PR statement by the cruise line:
https://www.columbia-cs.com/statement-on-rcgs-resolute-incident/

the warship literally committed suicide and lost to a boat meant to see penguins.
"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.
Wanglicious
04/03/2020
04:51 PM
#2

"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.
banananor
04/03/2020
04:54 PM
#3
oh lordy.

did the crew die?
You did indeed stab me in the back. However, you are only level one, whilst I am level 50. That means I should remain uninjured.
Wanglicious
04/03/2020
04:59 PM
#4
the cruise ship one? perfectly fine! they say they waited for an hour until they got the OK.
Venezuelan ship? no idea.

i'm not sure they want to admit to anything because their navy literally jobbed to a cruise ship.
"Maybe it's a tentacle, molesting the planet itself. - Aschen Brodel.
Kinglicious
04/03/2020
06:39 PM
#5
Still laughing at a warship jobbing out this badly.
The King Wang.
Listen up Urinal Cake. I already have something that tells me if I'm too drunk when I pee on it: My friends. - Colbert.
_stingers_
04/03/2020
06:45 PM
#6
This is incredible lmao
Congrats Black Turtle !
Kinglicious
04/03/2020
10:23 PM
#7
It's one of my favorite things.
The King Wang.
Listen up Urinal Cake. I already have something that tells me if I'm too drunk when I pee on it: My friends. - Colbert.
Corrik7
04/03/2020
10:25 PM
#8
Oh you beat me to this story.
Xbox Live User Name - Corrik
Currently playing: Spider-Man (PS4), Quantum Break (X1)
Pirateking2000
04/03/2020
11:04 PM
#9
They were resolute to see those fucking penguins man.
XBL GT: Demon Ninja X2
"There comes a time in every man's or woman's life where they have to make **** up to cover their ass." - Hazama
Board 8 » WHO WOULD WIN IN A FIGHT: Venezuelan Warship vs. Cruise Ship to see penguins