C/D: You've never been drunk.

C. I've always been too afraid of alcohol.

I finally tried some once. Half a glass of white wine that literally just tasted like ethanol. Despite finding it disgusting, I found myself wanting more immediately. Which I figured was addiction rearing its ugly head already, so I left it at that and never touched the stuff again.

I was hoping being able to answer "yes" to "have you ever tried it" would shut people up, but what it actually did was draw the discussion out further when they then demand to know what you tried and try to make a billion suggestions.

I'm considering designing one of those dog whistles, but tuned to a frequency only alcoholics can hear so that I can just keep blowing it every time they won't accept that I'm trying to end the conversation.