Tc get some therapy. Gamefaqs isn't the place for this. Either your going to get insulted or your going to go further down your broken thinking and end making yourself miserable at the end. You have some serious concerns that makes me think you have an ocd problem. Do yourself a favor. Get off the website. Go seek professional help
My friend code is: 2842-5212-7233
LF: Laptop, wall mounted tv(black) wide screen t.v. 60 in(black) box corner sofa set(white)