I have nowhere near enough insight into your life and mindset in general to actually diagnose you with anything (not legitimately, at least).
An actual professional definitely shouldn't try to diagnose someone over the Internet. One of the many problems with BetterHelp as a service. And it's not helped by the fact that many terminally online people only want to be diagnosed with something so they can use it as an excuse for their own bad behavior rather than out of any genuine concern or desire to want to get better.
If you really feel the need for qualified help, find a therapist local to you who you can trust to address your various issues. But I'd definitely discourage it if all you really want is for someone to tell you "You're broken and that means nothing is your fault", or "Here's some pills, they'll make you feel better".
The real value in therapy is being able to talk through your issues with someone who is actually willing to listen, and who you can let your guard down with (as opposed to people in your life, who you may be too afraid to be completely vulnerable with). Venting is a huge part of mental health that most people don't really get the opportunity to take advantage of. An active and engaged listener can help unburden a lot of things you might not even realize you've been carrying around.
Think of it like a chiropractic massage for your brain. A good therapist will help you work out all the knots and kinks and strains so you feel looser and more flexible.
"Wall of Text'D!"
--- oldskoolplayr76
"POwned again."
--- blight family