adjl posted...
Mostly, it's a matter of figuring out how to resume whatever you'd come to consider routine in the old place. Some of that comes with time, some of it comes with finding new places to store (and then later find) things, some of it comes with setting up hobby spaces and things like that... It's primarily a matter of getting past the stage of "oh, I haven't done that here yet, how do I do it?", because it's those moments of getting bogged down trying to solve a problem that was already solved in the old place that prevent a new place from feeling comfortable and normal. If you take some time to plan out those solutions proactively, it can save you that disruption later on and the new place will feel more like home.
In your particular case, though, where you've got so much anxiety that's going to be disrupted by the change of environment, I'd suggest talking to your therapist to help you find coping mechanisms to get you through the transition. For anyone that's struggling with a transition, therapy can help, but I expect that you specifically will have trouble with "just wait a bit and you'll get used to it" such that getting some outside help is probably a good idea.
Also, if you're afraid to go to the kitchen because your mom might be upset by that, that's not a healthy situation at all. Whether that's your own paranoia exaggerating the risk or her being overtly abusive, that's something that needs to be addressed. Maybe setting up some kind of divider in her space will help to give her a bit more privacy.
Hard to say. If he's been living with her because he hasn't been able to get the disability payments he'd need to live independently, her intercepting those payments is a big deal and she probably wouldn't be able to get away with "I housed him and therefore I don't owe him any money." If he'd be a dependent either way, then the disability money she's been getting for him was meant to help support him and the fact that he's lived with her makes it more likely that it's been used for the intended purpose. It's still not a good thing to do because it's messed with his ability to figure out whether or not he could live independently, but she might be above board.
I mean since it's a project too there are millions of neighbors, I smoke cigarettes, so I do go outside. There's already one guy who's been nothing but nice talking but he's out a lot too, I'm not one to speak much tbh, even at the old place, seen same neighbor's but they got use to the fact that, I just prefer not talking to people. Depending on moods, I'm not always capable of carrying full conversations outside hi and bye. Idk why always had that problem, yesterday and already today I am feeling painful depression where its hard to have conversations every time I see the person, plus I'm not good at bringing up topics and such either. I have bipolar 2, my whole life I was diagnosed with Asperger's which I believe I still have, examiner ruled out Asperger's due to saying I talked well and gave her eye contact, something that takes nearly all my effort to do.
Anyways, my mom dropped that disability bomb shell before the move, and said she collects it because shes my care giver and uses it mostly towards rent due to how expensive it was at the last place. Idk how or depending on the type if I can have it transferred to me. I mean, from what I've read about this area, it's extremely cheap, they take 33% of income.
Yeah, need to reconnect with therapist, I'm not sure if he can help in this situation. I like to drink fluids when I smoke, she's picky on what type of drink holder I can bring outside for my water, cant bring a 3 liter bottle out, cant bring a hydro flask, shes just bitchy tone with everything and extra controlling over here. Worst is, I have to frequently use bathroom due to medications, now stuck with one bathroom with 4 people compared to a 3 bed room and upstairs where my grandpa lived for a second bathroom so I was all set.
This isn't just a move to a new place, everything is worse. Feel like I'm about to fall out of this bed constantly at night, had a bigger one at the other place, everything is much tinier. Her not having a bedroom, means passing her uncomfortably to go outside and smoke, or use the kitchen. I'm on edge.